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Favorite Tweets on TwitterWhile we are making some adjustments, we expect to be back online soon!

Unfortunately, after 5 years of providing you with Twitter data, we were now informed by Twitter that Twopcharts is suspended from interacting with the Twitter API for violating the Twitter Terms of Service. At this moment we do not know if and when this situation will be remedied, but for the moment we cannot provide you with data and analytics from Twitter.

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You can check up to the last 200 tweets that are favorited by any unprotected Twitter user.
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ImageNameLocationTwitter sinceLinks
QueenOfCorruptionIn @JoblessSamurai's Igloo2011-10-27
@Soo_Scandalouss1,041 days
I skip Confession to be here. @Imajika25 is always hungry & in danger. @GreenSmoke_ would go to jail with me. @TheSchazZ & I are all that!
FollowersFollowingTweetsListsFavorites
4,9441,94119,93922253,933
We found 199 favorite tweets.
QueenOfCorruption @Soo_Scandalouss
Everytime I open my cabinet, its like I should give Sabrina's hair dryer back.. Forget.. Every damn time. Repeat.
24d               
3
QueenOfCorruption @Soo_Scandalouss
Be white, black, bi or crazy and you got me
25d               
5
Dunk @TheDunkle
If you're an adult woman and excited for the 50 Shades movie, call me. You obviously haven't been fucked properly in some time.
36d               
3
thomas schreiber @TheMFkingTK
Florida pic.twitter.com/DNfyCwDvSD
37d               
4
Sami @Samigrl2
Drunk packing, because it adds to the adventure.
41d               
20
7
The Flounder Pounder @Amiigat
#FF @RadOrDie @sapphireeyezz @sara_ashlynn @ScreaminMomX2 @Soo_Scandalouss @Sleepsinwetspot @StilettoSuprmom @TheCamelToe_ @thejessbess
73d               
5
Jason @5oulhealer
The world without coffee

Depresso
119d               
2,076
1,839
[seagull]sk[i] @seagullski
You people are so annoying when you're not miserable
174d               
25
5
Super Girl @AphroditeAfter5
After I read your tweets, I roll my eyes and do the jack off motion

-then star
179d               
325
155
X Alqee @Xalqee
Hey religious people, at my age I'm only interested if I can " Pray the Gray Away"
181d               
80
17
The Flounder Pounder @Amiigat
#FF @ScreaminMomX2 @Soo_Scandalouss @Stef_Nfection @swbelieves @TheCamelToe_ @thejessbess @TNTwat @Tortilla_Nazi @tsunamiqueen
185d               
1
Fortuitous Pen @FortuitousPen
You call it shame and regret. I call it research and development.
243d               
966
723
Taylor @gingerfaced
Twitter is the dating site where people don't care if you don't have a job.
288d               
252
114
Jamie Ramone @jamieramone
Crazy, but you guys are important to me & I wanted to tell you that it's my clean birthday. It's been 4 years since I touched heroin! :)
303d               
16
Kirsten Pierce @kpLovee2
I cuddle with my animals so much I don't remember how to cuddle with humans.
303d               
5
3
Manoj @Manojsureka
One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life. That word is love.
303d               
44
62
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
To be honest. By the time I figured out sex. It became totally meaningless.
313d               
56
11
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
You guys are gonna go back and star these tweets after the world series right?
313d               
59
6
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Biggest mistake I ever make when I'm sober is not drinking.
313d               
50
10
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I hope my glass slipper shatters when I kick you in the ass with it.
313d               
20
10
Donna T @sweetg35
It's dark out there!! Still a prisoner at work 😠😖
313d               
52
7
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
When I grow up, I want to be able to ejaculate bullets.
313d               
19
4
Donna T @sweetg35
I miss bitching about the hot weather! 😁 brrrr it's cold!
313d               
69
20
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
You can argue with Obama, but you can't argue with the white bitches who faint when he talks.
313d               
9
2
Donna T @sweetg35
Follow him! @TheAlexP Thank u my friend for the trophy! Appreciate it! 😎😉 No act of kindness is ever wasted. favstar.fm/users/TheAlexP…
313d               
19
2
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
My unicorn is a black girl with real hair.
313d               
19
6
Donna T @sweetg35
Sometimes I would like to disappear without a trace..
313d               
293
235
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I need 100% compliance if you wanna get in my pants.
313d               
14
6
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
To the ballin' ass brothas with the candy cars: Don't ever park in front of my house. I want to be able to sell it one day.
313d               
11
2
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Ever take a detour to avoid the annoying driver in front of you? Tell me about it. Anyway...where am I?
314d               
62
24
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Twitter just wouldn't be the same without all the dick riding.
314d               
15
3
Donna T @sweetg35
No act of kindness is ever wasted.
314d               
489
421
Donna T @sweetg35
It's ok to forget the past, but remember what it taught you.
314d               
189
129
Donna T @sweetg35
Good morning twitter! Have a a happy hump day! 😉😋 enjoy
314d               
47
6
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Girl, you look like you'd be worth having my wages garnished.
314d               
38
17
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Revenge is a dish best served by your new girlfriend who is hotter and younger than your ex.
314d               
25
4
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
You can't degrade someone who already thinks the worst of his/her self.
314d               
34
17
Jenipher @jehujeni
If you fall, there’s a really good chance I’ll end up on the ground too . . . from laughing so hard.
314d               
28
3
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Bitch better have wi-fi.
314d               
17
4
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Reach out and touch me, baby. But put on some hand sanitizer first.
314d               
18
2
Donna T @sweetg35
I seem to always be looking for things that aren't there..like my money!
314d               
110
75
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I love you so much that if you were on life support, I'd pull the plug.
314d               
29
20
Donna T @sweetg35
Doubt is just fear of the unknown.
314d               
172
116
Donna T @sweetg35
Some days music has to be cranked louder than others.
314d               
231
155
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
My love dies a thousand deaths each day.
314d               
8
4
Donna T @sweetg35
Enough negative in my life.. Bring on the positive 😋😉
315d               
128
64
Donna T @sweetg35
Why torture yourself when problems will do it for you..
315d               
169
113
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
I'm confused between a vagina and a demanding vagina.
315d               
14
1
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
My heart's only in the right place when I have an erection.
315d               
14
6
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I'm saving my love for someone I don't even know.
315d               
88
56
Donna T @sweetg35
Talking louder does not make you any less wrong!!
315d               
207
146
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I like when women introduce me to their friends and I get to rub up against them, too.
315d               
22
2
Jenipher @jehujeni
No matter how old you get your mom will pop you in the head when you make a joke during Grace. Ow!
315d               
30
7
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Bitch, what are you gonna do with the .7 seconds you save by typing "NE1" instead of anyone?
315d               
16
2
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Drink that beer on an empty stomach. You'll be glad you did.
315d               
33
14
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Let your wife do the talking so I know that you're as big of a bitch as she is.
315d               
14
5
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
When a girl says she "likes football" I drill her in the face with a tight spiral to remind her that she'd better not burn my fucking pizza.
315d               
55
27
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Ask the ladies with the shaky legs about me.
315d               
35
19
Jenipher @jehujeni
Our favorite candy bar, the same, favorite chips, same, favorite ice cream, the same. Its time to find new favorites cause fuck sharing!
315d               
29
8
Donna T @sweetg35
Damn auto correct screws shit up! 😳😠
315d               
58
11
Donna T @sweetg35
Sweeping things "under the rug" will eventually creat lumps.
315d               
151
81
Jenipher @jehujeni
A lot of us are here to laugh. If you don’t like nonsense and silliness RT’d in your TL unfollow & block or better yet sign the fuck out. <3
315d               
37
10
Jenipher @jehujeni
Other than being able to purchase alcohol being an adult is STUPID!!!
315d               
62
27
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
Don't stop sending weed.
315d               
17
5
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Doze before hoes
316d               
10
4
Donna T @sweetg35
People that always assume should try assuming that they're probably wrong. 😠
316d               
177
151
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
We tear ourselves apart like no one else can.
316d               
63
32
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
What is this the day today? I have no fucking !dea. pic.twitter.com/6S0LnPAYEU
316d               
10
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Ok, if pumpkin spice is gay, how do you explain this awesome sweater I'm wearing with the cats on it?
316d               
20
4
jon @JoblessSamurai
I only masturbate while the Back to the Future theme is playing
316d               
7
1
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
For every minute you're sober. You lose sixty seconds of happiness.
316d               
264
170
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
I just opened the dryer door & a quarter fell out and rolled underneath it, so I guess I just opened myself a savings account.
316d               
281
148
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
Fuck me like you're my Vodafone internet connection.
316d               
17
3
Jenipher @jehujeni
Every time she says, “I don’t wanna sound crazy but …”. She does.
317d               
45
20
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
My safe word is "hurry go get your sister".
317d               
74
22
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Twitter is really simple but you insist on making it complicated. By not going to the liquor store.
317d               
70
24
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
People never cease to amaze me how fucking shitty they are.
317d               
100
54
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Don't give a shit if you swallow. For me. It's the effort that counts.
317d               
61
13
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Just relax and let the alcohol do it's work (and delete tomorrow).
317d               
64
17
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
The first time I had sex it was awful. In fact the hooker charged me extra just to finish.
317d               
48
4
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Thanks @mar1ig0ld for the TotD. You're awesome. favstar.fm/t/391413479044…
317d               
11
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Fuck her like she sold all your Star Wars toys…err action figures, I mean action figures damn it!
317d               
160
68
Jenipher @jehujeni
One good thing about having teenagers is they don’t wake up at the crack of dawn. I get to sleep til almost noon too.
317d               
35
6
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
My greatest talent is solving everybody else’s problems while completely ignoring my own.
318d               
446
336
Jenipher @jehujeni
If you talk as much as you tweet …. That’s gonna be a problem.
318d               
33
9
Jenipher @jehujeni
If I can hear the blinker the music isn’t loud enough.
318d               
46
24
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Seriously, the only advice I am looking for is how to shut you the fuck up.
318d               
68
32
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Twitter. Results may vary.
318d               
264
149
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
There comes a time in life where you have to wait to see what happens next. This is the time you should be drinking Vodka heavily.
318d               
55
13
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Vodka doesn't necessarily improve sex. But it definitely helps with forgetting who you slept with.
318d               
58
13
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
If you find someone that can make silence sweet, don’t measure the beats between spoken words, just hold on to them for eternity if you can.
318d               
286
169
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Any idiot can tweet something decent. It's the day to day tweeting that really wears you out.
318d               
55
9
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Best thing about twitter is getting drunk enough to not remember any of it.
318d               
46
11
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
In case you wanna know where I'm busy. pic.twitter.com/UucRoiQmbK
318d               
5
Jenipher @jehujeni
You sin just like me . . . well, not just like me . . . I sin way better.
319d               
71
39
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
In hell you’re always stuck behind someone that doesn’t know how to use the self checkout in Walmart.
319d               
144
62
peterjames48 @peterjames48
It's not a "convenience" store if it's on the wrong side of the street, MR. TEDESCHI.
319d               
42
6
Envy Da Tropic @envydatropic
Mistakes but owning up to them.
319d               
70
39
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Most nights on twitter I have the right to remain silent. But I don't have the ability.
319d               
102
53
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
You are the condom, sweetheart.
319d               
17
8
Jenipher @jehujeni
You remind me of someone so I’m gonna need you to stop talking.
319d               
43
15
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
I bet Teddy Ruxpin got so much Care Bear ass back in the day.
319d               
203
107
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Me? Oh nothing. I’m just squishing people’s heads with my index finger & thumb while sitting in my car.

Like any mature adult would do

Duh
320d               
179
64
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Happy Bday to mother fucking me. Whoo hoo.
320d               
4
Lone_Star @Carter_TCB
Twitter is NOT always easy. Sometimes it takes a shitload of Vodka to get her to put out.
320d               
62
13
Mandy Slamberg @MandySlamberg
this morning i was all "fuck this, i'm getting a frappuccino" and then i did and it was the most wild thing i've done in about 4 years
321d               
46
4
peterjames48 @peterjames48
That "W" tweet was an accident, not a shoutout to the fashion magazine. Sorry, Condé Nast.
321d               
39
3
peterjames48 @peterjames48
W
321d               
19
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Send a wildberry cooler in the kids lunch one time, and now I'm the bad guy. Woo000oow.
321d               
10
1
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Smoking four cigarettes in a row, cause fuck that was a long day.
321d               
11
4
peterjames48 @peterjames48
I don't know, maybe the pedestrian walk button closes the elevator door and the door close button makes the light change.
322d               
70
34
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
I want someone for when my world turns grey, they’ll be there with a kind word & a set of watercolors. I believe everyone deserves that much
322d               
316
213
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Nope, not dancing to Kool and the Gang unless it's "Hollywood Swingin'" or "Jungle Boogie." Celebrate the good times without me.
322d               
39
3
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
“I’ll shut up now.” - People who keep talking regardless of the fact they just said this & then you set them on fire with a flamethrower.
322d               
108
50
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
I know how to write fuck off in 118 languages.
322d               
16
4
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Her: that was awesome. I love the way you fuck me.
Me: don't forget to tell your friends.
Her:.......
322d               
5
2
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Eating donuts is what comes between "I want donuts" and "I wish I hadn't eaten those donuts."
323d               
89
32
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
I saw a toy vagina today. Believe me I could only see it.
323d               
13
2
jon @JoblessSamurai
Iife is shit! yet another season of The Walking Dead I need to hate-masturbate too
323d               
2
Multiple Stab Wounds @SonOfCha
If a unicorn just shows up without weed that's one thing, but if it's supposed to bring me weed & forgets, that's fucked.
323d               
62
29
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Before you complain about anyone’s tweets, remember a few things:

You can block them

You’re a little whining bitch

Your mother is a whore
324d               
298
186
jon @JoblessSamurai
it's late, so I'll just say it: i've came while watching Space Jam over 10 times
324d               
3
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Hanging out in northern New Hampshire. As if regular New Hampshire wasn't northern enough.
324d               
37
1
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Sometimes I avoid twitter the same way avoid real life.
324d               
7
2
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
I can’t decide if I want to cuddle with somebody or torch a hospital with a flamethrower.
324d               
143
73
jon @JoblessSamurai
if I don't care about what Duran Duran thinks about my overwhelmingly underrated tweets, then tell me: why should I care about Obamacare?!?
325d               
3
3
jon @JoblessSamurai
you would think a tweet about a NAZI uprising within the SMURF village would put you over the top on Twitter...WRONG what am I doing here???
325d               
4
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
Drunk men are assholes. I see some around.
325d               
15
1
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Who needs a ‘happy place’ when there’s alcohol?
326d               
142
75
Déjà Vù © @P8NT4R
Subtweet me because I'm great at reading between the lines... Said no guy ever
326d               
24
7
n2o @1evilidiot
Twosomes are perfect, a threesome is nice once in a while, but my percentage of onesomes is way too high.
326d               
83
28
n2o @1evilidiot
I carry extra crime scenes with me, just in case.
326d               
64
16
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Don’t judge me by my horrible life choices instead judge me by the quality of my tweets which happen too be about my horrible life choices.
326d               
158
76
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Sometimes the people we miss the most are the people we never truly had.
326d               
317
200
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
If my parents didnt want me drinking all the booze in the house, they wouldn't have left it here when they went to groceries.
326d               
5
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Instead of worrying about it, we'll have a few drinks and let it sort it's self out.~~ my answer to everything.
326d               
6
2
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
How much of this baby powder do I have to snort before I have baby's.
327d               
4
1
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
I'm the Amy Winehouse of metal fabricating.
327d               
4
jon @JoblessSamurai
prayer request over on Facebook...sorry gotta jet
327d               
4
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Throwing shit around when I don't get my own way always makes me feel better.
327d               
7
2
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
I wish your stages of being drunk included:

1. Shutting the fuck up

2. Shutting the fuck up

3. Shutting the fuck up

4. Alcohol poisoning
327d               
309
154
Stop!I'mAlreadyDead @Imajika25
My boobs are tits.
327d               
14
2
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
No bro! I am not done yet. I'll go for another gun shot after we finish this drink.
327d               
12
2
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
LOL at people who 'happy birthday' themselves.
327d               
24
12
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
I forgot when I last signed out of twitter.
327d               
40
18
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
HR: Do you know why you’re here?

Me: I spray painted YOLO on a coworker & set them on fire

HR: Your business cards…wait…WHAT?

Me: Nothing
328d               
225
110
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
I meant nice, well sized, cute, loveable puppies*.

*titties
328d               
15
3
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Don't worry vodka. I'll be home soon.
328d               
11
7
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
We are all masters of our destination, which is why I’m at the liquor store two hours before it opens up.
328d               
129
54
jon @JoblessSamurai
@ me the best place you've ever put a VHS tape
328d               
3
1
jon @JoblessSamurai
cool thing about the internet: someone called me Ultra Nigga tonight! Stars for everyone!
328d               
5
2
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Your tweets were funnier when you were using an avi that made you look more fuckable.
328d               
149
49
jon @JoblessSamurai
Beck has probably never seen one damn episode of Saved by the Bell! That's why he plays donkeys as instruments
329d               
1
jon @JoblessSamurai
when I lose followers, I just always remind myself that I had multiple one hit wonder cassette singles and it seems to balance itself out
329d               
3
1
Raghav. @GreenSmoke_
Fuck it. Followed.
331d               
11
1
jon @JoblessSamurai
how do i know if you want fingerbanged? It's like Twitter doesn't even care!
331d               
2
jon @JoblessSamurai
i've played a Nintendo with a 卍 on it! and I STILL couldn't beat Ghosts 'n Goblins!
331d               
3
Amy @YesThatAmy
You buy 6 bottles of wine and the cashier assumes you're having a party. Isn't that cute.
332d               
84
41
peterjames48 @peterjames48
I wish the Braves would replace their war chant with something less annoying, like vuvuzelas or a garbage disposal with a spoon in it.
332d               
50
11
jon @JoblessSamurai
startin' a dumpster fire down at the ole family plantation
333d               
3
1
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Ever wander into a room or a store or Rhode Island and forget why you went in there?
333d               
88
38
peterjames48 @peterjames48
"I'm not booing! I'm saying "BU-ble!"
"You're booing!"
"BOOOOOO! (blay)"

Why I'll never be invited to another Michael Buble concert.
339d               
72
14
peterjames48 @peterjames48
My definition of a good work day is one where they don't name a new safety rule after me.
341d               
116
51
Stop!I'mAlreadyDead @Imajika25
If your boyfriend doesn't refer to you as "dude" or "man" in everyday conversation than you're dating the wrong guys.
343d               
17
6
Daniel Plainview @10InchesPlus
I'm out of ideas, but not "start a new account and blame it on all the drama" out of ideas.
343d               
50
15
Richard Harris @RichHarris2
Can I have some salt with that lust? Straight from your body would be fine.
343d               
48
13
SexxxiSarcasmic @LipLush1
Chocolate covered orgasms

..that should be a thing
343d               
161
67
Glenn Rockowitz @justaride
I hope one day I'm happy enough to hold my coffee with both hands
343d               
1,154
625
Grace Marie @DistractedMomma
I look most all of my fears straight in the face. Except love. I run crying like a little bitch from that motherfucker.
343d               
144
91
Angie @AngelinaC72
Tough as nails. Fragile as glass. Life hands us such dichotomy. Is it any wonder we're confused?
344d               
23
15
Grace Marie @DistractedMomma
I would totally be in a relationship, but I prefer orgasms without complications.
344d               
231
123
Grace Marie @DistractedMomma
You call it bipolar, I call it keeping our love alive in a variety of new and exciting ways.
344d               
363
249
Cundalini @Cunda22
You always know when you've hit rock bottom when you realise you have more friends in real life than you do on Twitter.
*Lays here waiting*
344d               
29
7
Sheila @1Happytwit
Don't think about tomorrow because that's when the screaming starts.
345d               
323
170
peterjames48 @peterjames48
"There's five little letters that are missing here." - Naughty by Nature throwing away an old Scrabble set
345d               
55
8
Wendy @foxxy311
I'm going to this kids party for the birthday cake. So help them if there's no cake.
345d               
64
28
Grace Marie @DistractedMomma
"I wanna fuck you all night long"

* 5 years later

"Can we just hurry up and get this over with, I'm tired"

- Every women, ever.
346d               
281
136
peterjames48 @peterjames48
What rhymes with "Robin Thicke doesn't understand how rhyming works"?
346d               
93
33
Lil' Stizzle @UGotMeRight
You don't nearly fuck off as much as you should.
346d               
80
52
Cabo @shot_of_cabo
Who's holding?
347d               
8
6
peterjames48 @peterjames48
I'm not saying these waiting-room magazines are old, but apparently the Expos are going to be really good this year.
347d               
76
16
Wendy @foxxy311
I'm feeling a little fancy today, I think I need a monocle.
347d               
58
18
Wendy @foxxy311
If the 30 or 40 jerks would stop following & unfollowing me I could finally order that custom frame for all of your Avis. <3
347d               
40
6
Moogs @_moogs
No friends, no girlfriend, no pets. I really need a pet.
347d               
1
Wendy @foxxy311
Today really tried to fuck me, but I'm saving myself for tomorrow.
347d               
121
66
Strawberry Fields @SondraDeeMe
The Vagina: Never use it as a parent trap.
347d               
49
19
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I'm glad I saw that picture where you aint as hot as I thought you were.
347d               
51
26
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I have nothing against people who look like horses.
347d               
20
2
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I'm more knee-buckler than swashbuckler, girl.
347d               
26
7
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
I only had pink eye once and I aint ever puttin' my whole face in a pussy again.
347d               
20
4
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Unfollow me because of someone else's @ so I know it's real... shitty.
347d               
19
5
peterjames48 @peterjames48
Shut up, booze.
347d               
65
12
Personal Jesus @JudgmentalJesus
Fun fact about me: when I have a bad day, many many people have a bad day.

Just works out that way.
347d               
13
8
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Being neglectful makes my dick hard.
347d               
19
9
Wendy @foxxy311
I have 3 exams & instead of studying I thought of different ways I'd like to kick & punch people I hate. So yeah I'm ready.
347d               
46
16
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Most of your Avi's are not showing and I can't see any pictures. I'm going to assume this is what twitter is Like in Detroit.
347d               
24
17
Strawberry Fields @SondraDeeMe
I'm wearing my: STD FREE SINCE 2003! tee when I meet the parents of my boyfriend.
I want them to know I'm a good girl, not some dirty whore.
347d               
611
277
low plains drifter @TheSchazZ
Day 3 of explaining to a ten year old he's not getting gta v, don't think I can hold out much longer.

I'm going to need a stronger drink.
347d               
10
Shkeeber @shkeeber
When no one is watching, Canada kicks dogs.
347d               
257
146
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