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Favorite Tweets on TwitterWhile we are making some adjustments, we expect to be back online soon!

Unfortunately, after 5 years of providing you with Twitter data, we were now informed by Twitter that Twopcharts is suspended from interacting with the Twitter API for violating the Twitter Terms of Service. At this moment we do not know if and when this situation will be remedied, but for the moment we cannot provide you with data and analytics from Twitter.

We are very sorry about this situation and the inconvenience it is causing. We hope the situation can be resolved soon.

You can check up to the last 200 tweets that are favorited by any unprotected Twitter user.
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ImageNameLocationTwitter sinceLinks
Michael FantMemphis, TN2008-05-13
@iFant0m2,317 days
I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut.
FollowersFollowingTweetsListsFavorites
1,2401,9374,8157336
We found 189 favorite tweets.
Blunk @Blunk
Ok... Apple streaming it's failing hard! Laggin continuosly and Chinese speaking
6d               
1
Whipping Boy @KKBowls
E-cigs are banned in Boston, New York, Chicago and LA night clubs and bars. But it's still perfectly acceptable to drink yourself to death
72d               
75
39
WMC Action News 5 @WMCActionNews5
The cost of the world's first proton radiation therapy center dedicated to children is $200M! Learn more: wmcactionnews5.com/story/25792890… #stjudemem
85d               
2
1
Chris Hardwick @nerdist
Just made a donation to @StJude and you can too! These kids need our help: shop.stjude.org/GiftCatalog/do…
86d               
242
120
Andy @Ewans_Dad
It's amazing how much better of a mood I get in once I start drinking.
86d               
18
3
A.D.D @Rikidus
Seriously, for those who battle through the loss or absence of their father. I salute you. I know the strength it takes.
92d               
28
4
MR531 : GEEK @mroberts531
Fresh build for tonight on my genuine atomic rda. Dual vertical coil 24g around 2.5mm drill bit -… instagram.com/p/pE2BR_Kg9f/
97d               
1
Brian Tufo @brian_tufo
Just got some Green Apple from Mr. Baker Vapor. So delicious. Vaping it in the Patriot with dual coils running at... pic.twitter.com/F7r3goHFrP
134d               
1
Angry1Dev @Angry1Dev
I dont understand why "normal" ppl follow me. Your not going to like me. And no i just wont auto follow you either
137d               
2
1
Apple First @applefirst
How to Stop Your iPhone from Remembering Everywhere You Go, All the Time snsanalytics.com/U7sCy6
138d               
1
3
Zach Epstein @zacharye
I really can't stress enough how important this is... How to tell if any of your accounts have been hacked bgr.co/1nyErnE
140d               
42
33
Michael Harwood @UofM_Tiger9396
@iFant0m @thefishnation @mconley11 kind of has that Miami Vice Crockett & Tubbs look going
155d in reply to iFant0m               
1
UberFacts @UberFacts
Tips on how to make gourmet pot brownies: bit.ly/1iUHCogsp pic.twitter.com/clw3g3ziGz
156d               
1,784
624
Richard Lewis @TheRichardLewis
Fearless. pic.twitter.com/ojLlAC238Q
156d               
97
60
♔Jesenia♔ @Luv_SxyJessie
ⒻⓄⓁⓁⓄⓌ♥❤️ⒻⓇⒾⒹⒶⓎ @Holdemdogg @iFant0m @iphoneMaster323 @Irish116_ @iReaper954 @iPhone5s_nerd @iNeal @I4HACK @ipodguy79 @iCarbonsdotcom
171d               
1
2
Anonymous @YourAnonNews
Fukushima 2014: Don't Forget youtube.com/watch?v=sToy7_…
187d               
73
92
pussy doodles @SlabBaconBP
This tweet is so gay it just got refused service at a convenience store in Arizona.
201d               
46
16
Alex @Mewstarz
Protip: Speeding up animations 75% in iOS 7 makes it much nicer
234d               
2
3
SuBLiNeR @li0nic
GroovyLock: A Perfect iOS 7 Lockscreen idevicedailys.com/cydia/groovylo… #Cydia #Themes #iPhone
236d               
2
2
Joe Buck's Stache @joebuckstache_
@Bsleezy96 @Ju5tinNichols @KingCrab15 @nflnetwork aWwww suck it! Let Sherman give you a mouth enima! pic.twitter.com/0KpYTXQWBc
239d in reply to Bsleezy96               
4
2
SgtButtCheeks @SgtButtCheeks
It's all about dick pills, Dodge, and the discount double check.
239d               
4
3
Notorious P.U.G. @LuvPug
"So kids, I was married to your mom & I met this girl on Twitter, we started DMing and one thing led to another"

-How I Met Your Stepmother
239d               
739
362
Tim Van Horn @TVanHornWMC
Lunch time. Woop woop! instagram.com/p/jCmNhnsXLu/
247d               
2
1
SportsCenter @SportsCenter
Why We Love Sports Today: Grizzlies draft 8-year-old Charvis Brewer, who has cerebral palsy, in @MakeAWish ceremony. pic.twitter.com/QERwfvv1Tl
257d               
11,924
14,787
Gas Monkey Garage @GasMonkeyGarage
RT this and follow @RRRawlings and @GasMonkeyGarage for a chance to win my @Shinola watch for the new year! pic.twitter.com/STApl4jbTe
261d               
146
1,408
Memphis Grizzlies @memgrizz
Reppin' at @MemphisZoo ! > RT @Cullen4: Wearing the Bear and seeing the @memgrizz at the Zoo. instagram.com/p/ieWc4Pg2gH/
261d               
4
3
Tim Van Horn @TVanHornWMC
Our daughter's 1st #GoTigersGo game. Hoping to see her godfather @MEMPHISRADIO pic.twitter.com/vlflnO18ov
261d               
11
4
Pythagorean Mystic @MaStarPassion
And the desire for the unprepared To blame others for the devastation Left in the wake of change youtube.com/watch?v=ddjLsL…
298d               
1
1
Martha jones @missgrizz_
We have the greatest sideline announcers @PetePranica and @brevinknight22 in the nba. Grit n Grind all the time
300d               
3
3
Alex Grey @alexgreycosm
Create Love.
308d               
88
140
Steve Cushing @Montberte
TED: Arthur Benjamin: The magic of Fibonacci numbers - Arthur Benjamin (2013) feedproxy.google.com/~r/TEDTalks_vi…
311d               
6
13
Little Yellow Room @YellowRoom4Baby
1st haircut. Just a little bit to keep out of her eyes. The curls were definitely not touched. #7000Days pic.twitter.com/XA4KjTxwO3
312d               
1
1
The Robfather™ @thatUPSdude
Ask yourself if you knew you were going to die tomorrow how would you treat your loved ones today?

That's how we should always treat them.
324d               
78
63
Redmond Pie @RedmondPie
OS X Mavericks Has Hidden Wallpapers, Here’s How To Access Them dlvr.it/4Bxn2T
326d               
30
23
Jimmy Jazz @barrymanilowfan
I listen to GG Allin instead of doing drugs
326d               
3
3
Virtual Astronomer @VirtualAstro
RT @willgater: Here's a shot of the International Space Station taken through my 8" Schmidt-Cassegrain scope: pic.twitter.com/7Eu2gABhI7
327d               
55
48
UberFacts @UberFacts
Magic mushrooms (psilocybin) can make you permanently more creative, curious and inquisitive.
327d               
1,559
1,973
MacTheDave @MacTheDave
OS X Mavericks, iWork, and iLife is available for free. Somebody just had a nervous breakdown at Microsoft.
328d               
2
7
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
I liked a @YouTube video youtu.be/TZemFKSu3lE?a Tool-Stinkfist
343d               
1
1
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
I liked a @YouTube video youtu.be/UhjG47gtMCo?a Tool - Schism
343d               
1
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
I liked a @YouTube video youtu.be/E8vmaj75xzE?a Tool - Aenema (Lyrics and Meaning)
344d               
1
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
I liked a @YouTube video youtu.be/hii17sjSwfA?a Tool - Vicarious
344d               
1
Rene Ritchie @reneritchie
iPhone 5s review: tons of details for your geeking pleasure. imore.com/iphone-5s-revi… instagram.com/p/fAe3irGM6w/
347d               
27
12
Dj Stephens @DdotJAY30
A little disappointed in this new grading system in schools in Memphis... Lowering the bar isn't gonna help these kids in life
356d               
30
60
Kim Holcomb @kimholcomb
Figuring out iOS7 is like doing homework with a sparkly pen that dots the "i's" with hearts against my will.
362d               
204
392
Rene Ritchie @reneritchie
If you hear someone complaining about paying *again* for an iOS 7-updated app, tell them go to Starbucks and demand another latte for free.
362d               
63
182
Mike Beasley @MikeBeas
Amazing. The girl who set herself on fire while twerking was a stuntwoman. The video was faked by Jimmy Kimmel. haha

m.youtube.com/watch?v=HSJMoH…
370d               
4
2
Dr. Sheldon Cooper @TheRealSheldonC
Text someone "I could be the next Obama " with your iPhone and make sure you push Space after 'Obama' then hit send and watch what happens.
372d               
94
206
LambsCryWolf @LambypieShar
Blackberry doesn't have autocorrect. Probably because if you own a Blackberry its clear you've embraced the concept of being wrong.
372d               
95
65
onlyastoner @onlyastoner
paper sculpture that makes you feel high if you're not already: youtube.com/watch?v=yFvOTH…
373d               
6
8
TROOF N' SOUL @mrtruthandsoul
'Cash Only' places you are totally dead to me. Like I have any money.
373d               
86
40
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
Just ate some string cheese that had beef jerky in it.

STRING CHEESE THAT HAD BEEF JERKY IN IT.
375d               
39
11
HackiPhone .[]. @HackiPhone
Become a HackiPhone unlock reseller.
Start ur unlocking business today & earn loads of money. Join the best.
iMsg/email: hack.iphone@aol.com
382d               
1
1
Michael Fisher @Captain2Phones
Close flybys, sea crashes, & an aircraft carrier model the size of a compact car: @Rapidnadion's new vid has it all.

youtube.com/watch?v=FJBzbd…
384d               
1
2
Top Gear @BBC_TopGear
Who enjoyed Ron Howard on yesterday's #TopGear? Then just for you, here's some exclusive behind-the-scenes footage... ow.ly/mLiUB
434d               
44
50
Nevin K. @Nkapoor124
How to get iOS 7 by activating the UDID on your iDevice: youtu.be/yVGFLTPVRV0 via @YouTube
447d               
1
1
Life Humor @BestProHumor
NSA: Not Solo Anymore pic.twitter.com/eGQWeKWQn0
450d               
9
18
Leanne Packer @LPacker79
2 years ago today I stopped smoking and started vaping. In these past two years I've discovered the most amazing community. Thank you!
457d               
8
18
Jay Airey @Sgt_Impacto
@graemefullwood send $6 to @Nkapoor124 to register your device udid then, download iOS7 beta cl.ly/0O3l2U392238 & restore in itunes 😉
461d in reply to graemefullwood               
3
1
l3gitjailbr3aks @l3gitjailbr3aks
I’m not the one doing the downloads guys. @justinistech is….his site is ibetadownload.com
462d               
1
1
Jailbreak News [] @NewsJailbreak
Download iOS 7.0 BETA for iPad, iPhone, iPod touch mobilespie.com/2960/download-…
462d               
15
1
iJailbreak @iJailbreak
iOS 7 Concept Showcases Rumored Flat Design And Panoramic Wallpapers [VIDEO] bit.ly/10ESokD
475d               
4
8
Little Yellow Room @YellowRoom4Baby
SPECIAL BLOG: "And Baby Makes More Than Three" #adoption #adopt #infertility wp.me/p2FZfl-is
498d               
3
1
Alex Grey @alexgreycosm
I'll make ya a little Angel if you help us build ENTHEON! kickstarter.com/projects/alexg… pic.twitter.com/iAZ7k5jlRK
503d               
14
17
Pill Clinton @GOAT_KING_
Why do I see all these" RIP Kurt Cobain" tweets but no "RIP Layne Staley" tweets? They're both legends of grunge.
528d               
3
1
Amazing Cars @Automotive
Toyota GT86/Scion FR-S, 2012 pic.twitter.com/OCjTxfHkYn
536d               
60
75
iPhone News @iPhone_News
Add the Harlem Shake to your iPhone’s Lock screen dlvr.it/343cFZ #iPhone
553d               
4
10
appleman @iPhone_Nerds
This Crisp, Functional Lockscreen Is Reason Enough to Jailbreak Your iPhone: Whenever you bring up jailb... bit.ly/10Dfpcd
553d               
1
Nathan  @cyiPhone
This is China’s iPhone 5S bit.ly/10vAkdC
553d               
1
decke @deckedsg
Lol. Genuis RT @JiXeRMDR: hahahahaha @FilippoBiga has officially made the ONLY 'harlem shake' video worth watching!! youtu.be/-oGuZY8mnTQ
553d               
1
3
Theodore Douglas @TheTalkingT_Dog
Hey guys go follow this baby that lives in a box and occasionally looks at semi naked women in @LitteAssKicker! #TeamTDog
571d               
2
1
bucmachine @bucmachine
I’m a bad motherfucker until someone hands me a puppy.
585d               
431
273
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
#miLock Complete Setup Video!!! bit.ly/VGAmMh
585d               
5
4
Jailbreak Matrix @JailbreakMatrix
How to get your Weather back after the invasi0n jailbreak RT !!! jailbreakmatrix.com/howto/how-to-g… via @JailbreakMatrix
587d               
13
18
pod2g @pod2g
For power users. A fix for Weather.app : pod2g.org/2013/02/ios-mo…
588d               
168
324
Not Common Facts ™ @NotCommonFacts
Time is slightly faster 12 inches above the ground as opposed to at the ground. This means your feet are slightly younger than your head.
588d               
195
389
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
Required for #miLock

Winterboard
Lockscreen Clock hide
Lockscreen Dim Delay

That's it
588d               
1
4
ravirajm @rv1raj
Linux: sites.google.com/site/evad3rs/e…

Mac: sites.google.com/site/evad3rs/e…

Windows: sites.google.com/site/evad3rs/e…

#evasi0n
588d               
3
10
MR531 : GEEK @mroberts531
Just want to take this time to thank @evad3rs @planetbeing @pod2g @MuscleNerd @pimskeks 4 all their hard work, u guys are amazing! #evasi0n
588d               
1
5
What The F*** Facts @WhatTheFFacts
Semen contains estrogen and prostaglandins, both component are known to lower levels of depression in women.
588d               
384
1,145
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
@mroberts531 youtu.be/H1ywUtM5DNc
588d in reply to mroberts531               
1
1
JunesiPhone @JunesIphone
#miLock img.ly/sd7l img.ly/sd7m img.ly/sd7n img.ly/sd7o
594d               
1
6
Pill Clinton @GOAT_KING_
Something has to change, undeniable dilemma, but I'm not a burden anyone should bare.
594d               
1
1
Weird Hacks & Facts @TheWeirdWorld
Problem ?..... pic.twitter.com/XKzV0Csf
594d               
310
570
Nikias Bassen @pimskeks
If you people plan to upgrade to iOS 6.1 please don't do an OTA upgrade. Please make a full restore using iTunes.
595d               
120
885
UberFacts @UberFacts
With less than an hour’s time of instruction, people can be taught how to hold their breath underwater for over 4 minutes.
599d               
423
554
Stunning Earth @Stunning_Earth
Winter at The Grand Canyon. An amazing photo. #stunningearth

RT us to your pals 😉 pic.twitter.com/vcsCQvye
600d               
9
28
. @PixL50
I hope this iPhone 5 jailbreak gets here faster than my 9000th tweet
600d               
1
1
pussy doodles @SlabBaconBP
Never judge a Tool song by it's title. Unless it's Prison Sex or Stinkfist or Hooker With A Penis or Aenema or Jerk-off or FUCK IT NEVERMIND
604d               
158
67
Kevin Nealon @kevin_nealon
How do we know Oprah is not doping?
606d               
212
854
Opera @opera
We haven't heard anything, yet... RT @LaVanetta I wonder if Lance Armstrong admitted to using steroids to @opera
609d in reply to Ladylarie               
208
851
The H Factor @onelongbender
I don't ask for much, sunny days, a few close friends, and a world without fucking cancer.
614d               
41
30
Dave Navarro @DaveNavarro
No matter how long I have stayed off drugs, I still look through everything in my Dr's office while I am waiting. Old habits die hard!
614d               
69
49
Ryan @rzarosco
Imagine if dogs didn't just do doggy style. They 69d and did dog missionary and sometimes choked each other etc. That would be adorable.
618d               
790
390
dr. jeff @nerdfaced
Currently the best thing on the entire Internet. pic.twitter.com/Trp1GQYz
618d               
278
759
Anonymous @YourAnonNews
Don't drink and drive. Free rides from AAA. 1-800-222-4357 Put it in your phone right now.
623d               
544
3,704
Renholdër Lohner @dannylohner
...now that my parents are gone, things have changed. make sure you let your loved ones KNOW what they mean to you.
630d               
17
18
Bgniko @Bgniko
Holy shit! Eagle swoops down and tries to carry off small child!!! break.com/index/golden-e…
636d               
1
7
the Cult of Mike @elvisknievil
Dear Government,
If I drink $50 worth of booze I pass out. If I smoke $50 in weed, I eat $50 I'n food. Stimulate the economy, legalize it.
660d               
600
377
Nevin K. @Nkapoor124
Use the coupon code “unlock” at checkout (without the quotes) to get $1 off a factory unlock for one week! Just $11 nkapoor124.com/shop/att-iphon… RT!
676d               
2
8
COTA @circuitamericas
Watch the #USGP in style! The official @circuitamericas store is open for business: bit.ly/COTAstore pic.twitter.com/KJW2GVEU
676d               
7
18
PUSCIFER @puscifer
Good mornin blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com/uponsun/2012/1… @carinaround @telefontelaviv @mat_mitchell @JeffFriedl @MeatsMeier @mattmcjunkins @billyhowerdel @James_Iha
677d               
21
22
John Soprano @iJ0n4th4n
AT&T $12 unlock nkapoor124.com/shop/att-iphon… and Canadian Telus/Koodoo $80 unlock nkapoor124.com/shop/teluskood… fast processing! (via @Nkapoor124) 💯
686d               
2
4
Mind Blowing Facts @TheMindBlowing
BRAIN TEST --> pic.twitter.com/G046Lwbz
692d               
551
4,659
jessi @jessiwakeman
@iFant0m yfrog.com/mo8sknj random pussy shot to go with your cock pic.
693d in reply to iFant0m               
1
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
You are getting very sleepy.

Now that I have you hypnotized, you will starfuck the shit out of me... And maybe a retweet here and there...
693d               
17
7
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
I'm hilarious when I drink. Ask anybody I know.

I only know me.
693d               
13
3
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
You should really drink more.

It'll make me hilarious.
693d               
11
4
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
I wonder what the poor people are doing right now.

Oh, that's right, I'm tweeting to my imaginary friends.
693d               
13
2
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
"I'm not drunk."

-me, every time I'm drunk
693d               
583
287
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
My twitter machine just informed me I still have e-mail.

Who knew?
693d               
10
1
SgtButtCheeks @SgtButtCheeks
Breakfast instagr.am/p/Qj97mrM6Fz/
707d               
4
Matt Brian @m4tt
Apple's iPhone 5 is so good, even Samsung wants you to buy one: i.imgur.com/vLlrC.jpg (via @reddit)
718d               
13
106
Elvis Kenevil @elwaytotheend
My wife is the sexiest most beautiful person that I have ever wanted to strangle.
720d               
127
36
Big Money Rowlf @iRowlf
Blowjobs are like donuts.
If the homeowners association isn't giving out one or the other, I'm not going to the stupid fucking meeting.
720d               
55
26
iPhone News @iPhone_News
AT&T launches 4G LTE in 10 new markets ahead of iPhone 5 launch dlvr.it/2BRNFW #iPhone
726d               
2
14
ifonenation @ifonenation
Here Are All The iOS 6 Direct Download Links For Each Supported iDevice goo.gl/fb/RdV5v
726d               
1
Brian Sweet @besweeet
iOS 6 IPSWs: istheapplestoredown.de/ios
726d               
3
1
IJSMblog @IJSMblog
How To Cut SIM Card To Nano Size For #iPhone5 ijsmblog.com/2012/09/how-to…
727d               
3
1
1 in a REDzillion @redheadfantasee
My Other Ride Is Your COCK! twitpic.com/avrwoc
728d               
11
3
Jerm Himselfish @JermHimselfish
I have a really bad short-term memory but it's okay because I also have a really bad short-term memory.
728d               
179
89
Against Suicide @AgainstSuicide
Telling a depressed person to be happy is like telling a cancer patient to cure themselves.
730d               
120
421
♔Jesenia♔ @Luv_SxyJessie
Funny how we're all up for this! Love being a geek ❤😁 oh yeah! Oh iPhone cannot wait to have you in my hands 😝
732d               
2
2
Mike Beasley @MikeBeas
First thing on every carrier’s website is iPhone 5. No other phone gets that. None.
732d               
7
22
irrelevant @novocapulum
I have noticed that I get way more stars and retweets if I say cunt. I can safely conclude that my followers are classy as hell.
733d               
94
34
iCarbons Bruce @iCarbonsBruce
apple.com Video iPhone 5
733d               
1
Apple First @applefirst
Apple's big iPhone 5, iPod and iPad mini news will hit you in the pocket sns.mx/Vymey5
735d               
2
1
Adham Gonzalez @The_Gonzi
Now that's a word.. pic.twitter.com/4p0aCvke
735d               
4
12
Big Money Rowlf @iRowlf
Dudes who wear fedora hats look gayer than 6 dudes blowing each other, at an Elton John concert, while the Bravo channel films it.
739d               
47
22
Sabbles @sabbles
Fight the system.... Seagull style.... ^^ fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn…
741d               
1
1
Acacia @AintNoFamily
I smoke because I deserve to die before everyone else.
742d               
33
12
♔Jesenia♔ @Luv_SxyJessie
SaturdayRespect✰*⌒*✰ @Holdemdogg @iFant0m @ItsMeScottG @iphoneMaster323 @iReaper954 @iphoneman76 @iphone4S_nerd @ItsMeRobertG @imsorussian
744d               
1
1
Notorious P.U.G. @LuvPug
Don't judge me but I plan on getting shitfaced at this place I'm at.
I'm at Chuck E. Cheese.
745d               
37
11
Tim Van Horn @TVanHornWMC
Wife & I out to watch @MemphisWSoccer & support Carly Cassady #16 . She's got left side of D on lockdown! 2-0 lead at half #gotigersgo
745d               
1
1
TheLittlestSlobo @LittlestSlobo
Cum see me at xxxanalplayroom.com.The 10,000 follower gets an autographed pic of my shaved tight pussy. OOPS wrong account. Sorry everyone.
745d               
13
3
Bona Fide Intentions @BonaFideIntent
I've never been a follower. Well, I mean I follow u. Probably. Unless I don't of course. Then I'm not one of YOUR followers. I need a drink.
745d               
30
8
Nerf Herder @TrueTorontoGirl
Words can be hurtful; especially when they’re written on the side of a baseball bat.
746d               
107
37
Rusty @PeaceInTruth1
Practicing religion isn't the problem unless it keeps you from seeing that we're all the same regardless of race or sexual orientation.
747d               
55
20
Rusty @PeaceInTruth1
Don't follow me if you can't take a fucking joke.
747d               
94
37
Jerm Himselfish @JermHimselfish
I only date strong, independent women because they give the best piggy-back rides.
747d               
124
54
Bill Mc7 @BillMc7
"SMH, SMH, SMH, hi, SMH, SMH" (a text message from Muhammad Ali)
747d               
132
53
MemphisTigerNetwork @TigersMedia
Men's soccer is hosting a FREE clinic Sunday before the No. 11 women's soccer team takes on No. 5 Oklahoma State facebook.com/photo.php?fbid…
747d               
1
4
Misha BBQJones @mishakey
My Southern accent gets more prominent with strong emotion. For example, I just said "Got dayam, y'all motherfuckers stank!"
747d               
54
15
Parentpains @Parentpains
Leaving you with a look of shear disappointment is my signature sex move.
747d               
142
45
Erica Thordarson @EricaTheThor
No thank you, food that takes longer than 3 minutes to microwave.
748d               
17
3
Nichole @Nicholey23
If the song Stuck in the Middle with You doesn't make you think of Reservoir Dogs & that guy getting his ear hacked off, then you aren't me.
754d               
19
5
Drunk N Naughty @drunkNnaughty
Why watch porn when you can make it.
754d               
62
27
St. Jude @StJude
We have created a memorial fund to honor David McKee’s legacy and decades of service to the kids of @StJude: bit.ly/NgK49E
754d               
9
28
Irina Tikhomirova @IrinaGreenVoice
Do you need a reason to save this planet? Here is one of the millions reasons >> pic.twitter.com/ZFLh5aEl
756d               
19
20
Heather Loves You @HeatherLuvsYou
A foreign kid asked me how to speak English the other day, so I teached him some.
757d               
141
52
Jonathan S. Geller @boygenius
in case you missed it, AT&T sucks. bgr.com/2012/08/17/att…
757d               
6
41
UberFacts @UberFacts
Exercise can actually be BAD for your health! Learn more here: bit.ly/M2vPmzSP
760d               
59
113
Corey Paterson @Midgetspar
Bar fights would be more entertaining if pissed off dudes climbed up on their buddies shoulders and yelled, "Chicken fight, mother fucker!"
760d               
370
169
El Deesco @TheOneTrueDisco
My dick knows the palm of my hand like the back of my hand.
763d               
15
10
Gidget @gidget_76
I wore Jams shorts and Hypercolor shirts so uh, yeah, I think I know a little bit about high fashion, asshole.
767d               
32
8
Dave Hurley @hurlarious
I just realized if I saved my money I can be rich by the year 3581
768d               
56
19
FrauDammt @FrauDammt
Bless my heart?!? Did you just tell me to fuck off?? I speak “Southern” bitch!!
770d               
246
88
Ziltoid @Failgunner
@pdparticle settings wifi tap the disclosure indicator and under dns change 192.168.1.1 to 8.8.8.8
770d in reply to pdparticle               
1
1
Sam Adams @SamAdamsTPP
IRS sent 2,137 tax refunds for $3.3M to 1 Lansing address last yr detroitnews.com/article/201208… #LNYHBT #tcot And they want to run our healthcare!
771d               
4
45
Jailbreak Matrix @JailbreakMatrix
Best Prank Ever LMFAO 1:50 > youtube.com/watch?v=cJID3h…
788d               
2
1
inappropriate mom @nicfit75
It's a serious Lego project when the 1st thing my 5yo does is take off his shirt and gets me a beer from the fridge.
791d               
2,211
1,116
Vikkory Dickory Dock @vikkaroni
The only acceptable C word for describing women is Confident.

Cunts love it when you call them that.
793d               
1,266
690
Rbert Cper @c0ff33a
RT @JamesMandy: bloke was just at my house, showed me this star wars AT-AT bunk bed he made for his kid, holy shit! twitpic.com/a6c1ep 💯👍👍
797d               
1
1
UberFacts @UberFacts
"Schadenfreude" is a word for that feeling of joy and slight satisfaction you sometimes get from the misfortune of others.
797d               
947
1,960
Kyle Lippert @Kyle_Lippert
We're the most evolved species and yet birds migrate instinctively while I need my smartphone to find a place to shit when I'm in public.
798d               
42
11
Maarten Verkoren @verkoren
OMG dude discovers a huge beehive that was built up underneath his BBQ cover during winter bit.ly/MXzm2n
802d               
5
4
Alex Grey @alexgreycosm
WORLD PRAYER WHEEL
Prayers to purifiy the elements, liberate all beings, sustain the Lifeweb, Peace On Earth! pic.twitter.com/gy87KSuY
804d               
18
15
fish. @fishyy15
Here's a post on my website on how to hack WEP (Wifi) - fishyy15.com/?p=479
804d               
2
Brian Jee @brianjee
Was watching Star Wars & realized F1 cars need onboard R2-D2s to repair failures on-track. Alternators, KERS, stuck DRS, brake duct inlets…
808d               
3
56
Anthony @iSpeakComedy
Snooki is expecting her baby on December 21, 2012... It's like the Mayans knew.
809d               
73
313
JÆSIN RΩNIN @hipstagangsta
I need Korean Jesus from 21 Jump Street on my side. I can pray to him, cuz you know, he only deals with Korean shit. HE BUSY.
809d               
10
1
the Cult of Mike @elvisknievil
If you buy Funyuns, Dr Pepper, and a microwave burrito you should get a free pack of Zig-Zags.
809d               
21
11
Scott McClellan @bamasevere
The most epic closed captioning fail in history....just happened. #colorado #wildfire pic.twitter.com/QdsyxNTB
810d               
28
153
IOS-junkiez @IOSjunkiez
ios-junkiez.eu/index.php/foru…

Jailbreak IOS6 and install cydia
812d               
1
1
John Heaton @JohnRHeaton
Justin Bieber looks like a younger, thinner-faced, gay version of an older, wider-faced straight guy. AM I RIGHT
816d               
1
2
Cult of Mac @cultofmac
Stare Into Mac Infinity With This Escher-Esque MacBook Pro Illusion [Image] cultm.ac/MlMKNz
816d               
12
21
Big D Tiger 5.5 K @Dantier1307
@iFant0m Now Follow Michael Fant
818d in reply to iFant0m               
1
1
UberFacts @UberFacts
1 sperm cell contains about 37.5MB of DNA - So a normal ejaculation transfers about 1,587GB of data in 3 seconds.
822d               
777
2,816
Carina Round @carinaround
Damnit you're right “@philsphace: @carinaround Revenge of the Nerds.... and the the quote is actually "what the fuck is a robster craw?"
823d               
1
1
iModZone Downloads @iMZDL
These are not from us but give them a try if you cant wait amzdl.net/iOS6/ fb.me/1MhfwPQjU
826d               
16
9
ziggy7 @bAdziggy7
redsn0wjailbreak.com/download-ios-6… <<
826d               
2
1
iModZone Downloads @iMZDL
iPhone 4S iOS 6 Beta 1 - mediafire.com/?d5f7u3gts1qi5… fb.me/1rreOvTog
826d               
26
42
0xOllie @P01sonMak3r
iphone.zeusmos.com/ios_6_beta__ip… Spread it iOS 6 Download Mirror iPhone 4S 6.0
826d               
1
2
Stan Hutcheon @stnvh
udidead.stantheripper.com @UDIDead #UDIDead
826d               
4
4
Jailbreak News [] @NewsJailbreak
Download iOS 6 (build 10a5316k) for iPad, iPhone, iPod touch [Beta 1 Dev] cydiablog.com/download-ios-6… via @JAlLBREAKS #ios6 #wwdc
826d               
3
3
Joshua J. Drake @jduck
LOL @ latest MySQL auth bypass - j.mp/N0LRPv - while ! mysql -uPasswordedUser -pAnything; do false; done
827d               
49
139
Rene Ritchie @reneritchie
iOS devs at WWDC you should follow: imore.com/2012/06/08/ios…(Twitter list form: twitter.com/#!/reneritchie…) (If I missed you, @ me and I'll add you!)
828d               
26
12
AmyLooWho @DiaperSlinger
Dear fat guys with flip flops and toenails dragging the concrete...your tattoos look like cellulitis. Stop lookin at my tits.
830d               
34
6
♔Jesenia♔ @Luv_SxyJessie
A new morning means a new beginning new struggle but w/the Lord by our side we can overcome challenges & turn obstacles into stepping stones
830d               
1
1
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