We found 12 favorite tweets.
|With the Christmas season approaching, Hitler has brought out his new fragrance. Ho-Lacoste.|
|What do you call a ginger prostitute? |
Orange pay as you go
|Hasbro are making a new game for children, based on the aftermath of the Dale Farm evictions. They're calling it Hungry Hungry Gippo's |
|Giving my penis a nickname has brought me a lot of good luck. I keep having strokes of Genius. |
|Humpty Dumpty sat on't bed|
Lil Bo Peep was givin him head
As he came, she started to weep
She could tell by taste he'd been sexxin her sheep
|Roses are red|
Violets are blue
Pornhub is down
Your mums Facebook will do
|Me: "What's that smell?"|
GF: "I can't smell anything"
Me: "Neither can I, get that fucking cooker on"
|Dropped porridge on my cock n told GF I had an STI. She said it looked like warts. haha she's just gone for a test. |
|Haha flicked yoghurt at gf's face as she lay asleep. |
Left cat licking her face.
She just text saying she woke up wet & fishy
|Why does the French flag have Velcro?|
So the blue and red sections are easily removed during a time of war.
|I can't be the only man who mentally adds my cock to the sight of a girl yawning? |
|Opinions are like orgasms.|
Mine's more important and I don't give a fuck if she has one.