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50 Shades of Rey_Z2008-12-31
@rey_z1,937 days
Kitschy queer Morrissey fan into books, feminism and gin. Lady Macbeth meets Jessica Rabbit. 'Vulgar and insulting' according to a disgruntled follower.
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2,92296920,444474,153
We found 185 favorite tweets.
Abi @cherry_lambrini
Kelly Clarkson looks very awkward in her Nashville guest spot, no? When they ask ME to guest star I will SLAY, AND do a number. #Nashville
25m               
1
Andrew Jones @andrewj2009
Ok actually full on deserve this cigar I randomly found
8h               
2
Andrew Jones @andrewj2009
IVE NEVER CLEANED UP OTHER SICK ITS ALWAYS ME TO THROW UP SOS
8h               
2
Miss Anne Dree @alexeptable
"Review may contain spoilers". Obvs the story of Moses is p unknown so.
9h               
2
Louis Barfe @LFBarfe
Has Dolly been revived as a name yet? Obviously, if you want to call a child Dolly, she must be registered as Dorothy.
9h               
1
Louis Barfe @LFBarfe
My Twitter account's value increased from threepence-ha'penny to fourpence. Find your own pre-decimal worth as a human being at fuck.off.
9h               
14
5
Cher @cher
Did I wish every1
A DELICIOUS
EASTER 🐣
I saw Magnum
Ice Ceam Bar on TV ! WHOA 😍
I Think I Could Eat a “BOX”👻
“I COULD Eat a Box By MYSELF”😱
9h               
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Harry Flowers @HarryFlowersOBE
“A tweet you were mentioned in got laughed at and retweeted by a twat in a Starbucks”

What’s the point of these notifications exactly?
11h               
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Mark @biondino
I’m sad I missed out on Tinder because by the sound of it I’d be king of the world
11h               
2
Kim Karcrashian @doloreshaze
Just lookin at rich girls with huge teeth on Instagram pic.twitter.com/WNf9Lei8wq
11h               
2
Janis @janhopis
Alright, who the fuck gave Derek another series. Own up.
11h               
1
1
Kate @ginandting
I'd do bad things for a bowl of Crunchy Nut cornflakes right now.
12h               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@cherry_lambrini @rey_z I WAS BEING HUMOROUS YOU FUCKING BITCH TROLL FROM HELL GET BACK TO THE BOWEL YOU WERE EXCRETED FROM
12h in reply to cherry_lambrini               
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AB @bottrill
@rey_z @jpshaddock but there's so much more to me than the dickheads who like me :(
12h in reply to rey_z               
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AB @bottrill
@jpshaddock @rey_z DON'T ASSOCIATE MY NAME WITH THIS HELLHOLE
12h in reply to jpshaddock               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
We need to remember that Dougie fails the Wetherspoons test (would you go for it if they weren't famous and approached you at Wetherspoons)
12h               
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David Lewis @David_C_Lewis
@rey_z Get the fuck outta here, Tommy....
12h in reply to rey_z               
1
Tegan @BellJarred
I would like Tinder if it was actually goodreads.com book reviews instead of photos. Some people do really hot book reviews.
13h               
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A P O L L O @thisisapollo
You are a vile pervert and I want to put you in the bin @Terry_World
13h               
5
5
Freya @FuzzCookies
This. RT @chloemiriam: Billy bob Thornton is way sexier than brad Pitt. Oh angelina
13h               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
It's been a few hours since I've had a Twitter rant about a failed scheme. Shall I trawl the celebrity news sites for a bit?
13h               
1
Ciaran @pzdk
@rey_z Unless you're saying "show me how weird you are in 200 words or less" I can't even imagine what would inspire someone to write that
13h in reply to rey_z               
1
A P O L L O @thisisapollo
@rey_z not so much morbid as revoltingly trite.
13h in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z so hard rn
14h in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
I was cold I was naked were you there were you there
14h               
1
Toastbusters @mrkhndy
Idea: slow Fargo the fuck down so it's almost excruciatingly slow, add a filter, get Martin freeman in and pitch to telly network
14h               
3
1
ɯnlqploפ ɟɟǝſ @arcadia_eg0
Is jemble still a thing? I've been away...
14h               
2
ɯnlqploפ ɟɟǝſ @arcadia_eg0
In my mind I replace "timber" with "jemble" when I sing along
14h               
2
Hayrr X @Hayrr
1) mock everything all the time
2) offend as many people as possible
3) ?????????
4) FULL COMMUNISM
14h               
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A P O L L O @thisisapollo
My mama bought a special Easter cheese that was red and had a cross on it.........
14h               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@rey_z I know. When I was 19 I often went 100 days without doing anything.
15h in reply to rey_z               
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Caf @shutupcaf
Hey Veet, it's nearly a year since I last shaved my legs & I still love myself despite your body-shaming adverts pic.twitter.com/BENfseJPAL
15h               
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1
lucy sweet @lucytweet1
I can't believe I come back on here after ages away and boast about my holidays and nobody cares. Tuh.
15h               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
My sister's starting her new nursing placement tomorrow. Working in a supermarket to fund it. No day off for 14 WEEKS. Fucking hell.
15h               
1
Caf @shutupcaf
"There are some things about a man that look good on a woman, but stubble isn't one of them" oh fucking DO ONE, ridiculous Veet advert
15h               
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AB @bottrill
As I inhale a sharing size bag of jamón Ruffles as a pre-dinner snack, I suddenly understand how and why I got so fat last year
16h               
6
Paul Kindersley @PaulKindersley
P.s. Went to a gay bar and there was a sumo wrestler in just his thongthing dancing to Spiller Groovejet (remember that one)
17h               
10
Pete Field @nicehandwriting
Spare a thought for me, a stray cork from a bottle of Prosecco just nearly took my eye out.
17h               
3
CAMRA Obscura @hatwell
This guy’s at my party too. His name is Maki. pic.twitter.com/x2Bq1zQVAR
18h               
1
Jack Buckley @buckleyjack
@rey_z He went downhill after S-Club
18h in reply to rey_z               
1
Rank Tributes @svejky
Burning questions on our Bank Holiday walk: would you rather your child was a trot or an anarchist?
18h               
1
Hilbelina @HillyFoz
Getting into practice pic.twitter.com/eZLzlyQWTX
18h               
4
Femme Face @FemmeFace
Got home drunk last night and decided to put my shoes in the bath. Because that's where they live.
18h               
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Paul Kindersley @PaulKindersley
On a more cultured note, saw a brilliant Balthus retrispective with his wonderful illustrations fir Wuthering Heights pic.twitter.com/l6CVqRM8Rz
18h               
4
Elle @ElleEmmie
'Make sure you get my good side.' instagram.com/p/nA__ptj1m8/
19h               
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Andrew Jones @andrewj2009
Remember when Lindsay Lohan covered Edge of Seventeen??? Iconic.
19h               
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Marc Burrows @20thcenturymarc
@rey_z It’s pretty much living the dream, isn’t it. #GrownUps.
19h in reply to rey_z               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@rey_z Er subtweet at me much? pic.twitter.com/uO9gaR9fvb
19h in reply to rey_z               
1
Finkowska @finkowska
Cinema is chocolate 24 times per second. pic.twitter.com/AxNDtuy7GQ
20h               
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AB @bottrill
@rey_z proud of u
20h in reply to rey_z               
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tuba mcconky @mama_tuna
don't leave me unattended or let me make any decisions I regret them all
20h               
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AB @bottrill
Got in some extremely heated arguments with both a priest and an elderly gypsy today, wot bout u
20h               
1
Tegan @BellJarred
Can't stop reading my last tweet in an Alan Partridge voice and laughing. What a dick. What. A. Dick.
20h               
6
Felix @felix_cohen
"All-Seeing I with Jarvis Cocker - Walk Like a Panther" MY GOD
21h               
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Ginge @iconicpopstar
@cherry_lambrini Abi, you and I are soul mates.
21h in reply to cherry_lambrini               
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miseria cantare @weareglitter
@rey_z the sub-header to my entire life.
21h in reply to rey_z               
2
Abi @cherry_lambrini
@iconicpopstar Mikey there is one thing you need to understand about me: I tweet every individual thought I have
21h in reply to iconicpopstar               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@cherry_lambrini i love how you went away to regroup and refocus but spent the entire time still tweeting.
21h in reply to cherry_lambrini               
1
Tegan @BellJarred
Beach boys god only knows came on. Had to hide and have a cry. That song. That song.
21h               
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Ginge @iconicpopstar
@cherry_lambrini I think your main problem is that you fraternise with homosexuals, thus falling out of favour with Baby Jesus.
21h in reply to cherry_lambrini               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
I'm going to take some time. To regroup. Refocus. Assess my priorities. BRB.
21h               
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mostly grumpy @mostly_grumpy
Covered up in a shroud
My crucifixion got quite a crowd
While hive was busy controlling my heating at home
21h               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
Whereas on my FAKE Twitter for my PATHETIC BLOG where all I tweet is HASHTAG YUM and other SHIT I get some FREE fucking TRAINERS
21h               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
Case in point - despite the fact we are all agreed that 'myself' is hilarious, being 'myself' on this Twitter got me NOWHERE. NOWHERE.
21h               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
Is there ANY NEED for an ice cream van playing a jingle at a ZILLION DECIBELS to stop RIGHT OUTSIDE our house on a day LIKE TODAY?
21h               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
I think I've had an epiphany - the problem is I AM TOO INTERESTING. I have some evidence for this.
21h               
1
Rachel Smith @servingtea
petition to remove the word 'indeed' from all academia, ever
21h               
2
Abi Wilkinson @AbiWilks
Really nice to see men representing the moral majority by fantasising about murdering a woman and saying they're "too ugly to rape".
21h               
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1
McBoob @HootayMcBoob
@LFBarfe Nick Knowles needs beating to death with a wet sock filled with hot diarrhoea, he is fucking useless & revolting. Oh & a cunt
21h in reply to LFBarfe               
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1
mostly grumpy @mostly_grumpy
The vicar from gogglebox just favourited this. pic.twitter.com/pdBBZkJ7uN
22h               
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James @jpshaddock
Trying to read a book on the history of social media, but keep getting distracted by social media. The irony is not lost on me.
22h               
2
Dorian, Rebel Rebel @thewildestsea
Morose pic.twitter.com/xazovrcHny
22h               
3
AngryShopMan @AngryShopMan
My Facebook is full of shit like "Actually Easter is an ancient pagan festival of rebirth" Etc.
Well now it's about chocolate. So fuck you.
22h               
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17
Jack Buckley @buckleyjack
Forever cursed to be a member of the Finger Skateboard Generation
22h               
1
James Baker @James_Baker
imagine self-identifying as an atheist to strangers
22h               
2
Abi Wilkinson @AbiWilks
Nice reminder of how many people out there would like to remove women's ownership of their own bodies and force them to carry babies to term
22h               
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1
Primly Stable @PrimlyStable
"The Samaritans talked to our reporter for three hours - even though he wasn't REALLY suicidal"
22h               
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Betcoin. @ArchedEyebrowBR
Look at him :3 pic.twitter.com/HfkckuBCHr
22h               
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Betcoin. @ArchedEyebrowBR
I'm in the company of Dylan the doge 🐶 pic.twitter.com/1MTUlAFEr2
22h               
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Willard Foxton @WillardFoxton
Next week's MoS: How our reporter's dog lived in rent free in Battersea Dogs Home for a week, NO QUESTIONS ASKED.
1d               
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Charlie Steele @figureofalamb
a gluten free chocolate Easter for me. the worst kind of Easter.
1d               
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Steve @steveindisguise
It would be terrible if anyone sent him a text calling him a cunt.
1d               
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Joel Golby @joelgolby
next week's Mail on Sunday: our reporter was offered SHELTER with NO QUESTIONS ASKED in a HOSTEL and then Ross Slater FUCKED THE BED
1d               
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8
Prof. Bison Sexhorn @Brainmage
Brb guys, just pitching a piece to the Mail where I spend a month in an NHS hospital pretending to have expensive diseases.
1d               
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Helly @IAmHellsBells
I have some great eggs this morning.

*pats ovaries*
1d               
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Gawge @Gawge
"I lied, and now i'm sat here surrounded in the misery that is the compassion of others." pic.twitter.com/wPzk2uj4p7
1d               
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Joel Golby @joelgolby
look, I don't want to start a rumour that might slur the name of a Mail on Sunday reporter, but Ross Slater definitely fucked a jar of sauce
1d               
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Primly Stable @PrimlyStable
"What do you do for a living?"
"I lie to charities in a bid to stop them giving food to poor people."
1d               
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Girl on the Net @girlonthenet
Just watched the Wolf of Wall St and when it was over I wanted to rub money all over myself. It's not the same with 10p coins though.
1d               
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Harry Flowers @HarryFlowersOBE
So what I am saying is that I am better than you.
1d               
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1
Harry Flowers @HarryFlowersOBE
When baggy was all the rage, I was travelling the world and sampling it’s many, many delights. Not stood in a field in flares on drugs.
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
"Violence and tits." - My Dad, on Game of Thrones
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@iconicpopstar @rey_z I'm sorry, I was busy arranging my train journey to Manchester tonight
1d in reply to iconicpopstar               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini I'm just waiting for her to pass comment. I think it's interesting that she hasn't.
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini She's gagging for a good bit of finger banging with you, it's so obvious.
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini Oh no, I appreciate breasts. I just don't, like, sexualise them.
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini You've got a point though, babes, to be fair. I haven't and I don't think Abi could give me one. #innuendo
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
Drunk people are the best. ❤️ (This is in response to, "Really, I genuinely don't think I'm hot.") pic.twitter.com/3AGv1YIPfQ
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@rey_z Suggest you bookmark this mayanrocks.com/blog/friends_b…
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
@finkowska @rey_z I've noticed Toby only engages with my tweets if they directly reference thinking you are attractive
1d in reply to finkowska               
1
Finkowska @finkowska
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini Stop making this so easy. It's degrading for both of us and poor Abi has to watch.
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
KB @whiterussia
My mum: "I don't think you'll ever love anyone properly, it's not in your nature" excuse me, I love my cat and I love food so it clearly is
1d               
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Rank Tributes @svejky
Once I’d got Olivia Newton John I did t care about ANYTHING ELSE
1d               
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Romana Parmesana @Floramaria_
Not sure how your evenings going but I'm at my father's dinner and the Dread Queen is currently outdoing herself w/ the term 'pussy mongrel'
1d               
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goodinthestacks @goodinthestacks
@rey_z he fucks cats, weird
1d in reply to rey_z               
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Conor @checkdigit
@iconicpopstar @cherry_lambrini @jukepop @rey_z but if it’s a person of *interest* and they ignore me then that’s when I’m done with them.
1d in reply to iconicpopstar               
1
Susi @jukepop
@iconicpopstar @rey_z @cherry_lambrini @checkdigit it switches yours off but if you do it it switches everybody off so its fair game, hahaha
1d in reply to iconicpopstar               
1
KB @whiterussia
@jennifogg @cherry_lambrini @rey_z @SamDiss I hope you all know that I need to run every single purchase by you guys now. *~fashun gang~*
1d in reply to jennifogg               
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Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini @jukepop @checkdigit WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS BEING ABLE TO TAKE STEPS TO REMAIN SANE IS GOOD?!?!???
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Ronnie Joice @ronniejoice
Obsessed with Morrissey again so this may explain the fluctuating emotions in tweets at the moment.
1d               
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Caf @shutupcaf
@rey_z i think i love you
1d in reply to rey_z               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@iconicpopstar IT'S NOT FAIR MIKEY I FEEL THE SAME AS I DID THE DAY I FOUND OUT YOU WERE HOMOSEXUAL
1d in reply to iconicpopstar               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
IT'S NOT LIKE I STOOD BY AND WAITED FOR YOU THROUGH THAT WHOLE FRANKIE FROM THE SATURDAYS THING AS I KNEW I WAS THE ONE
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE BEEN THERE FOR YOU THROUGH EVERYTHING DOUGIE. IT'S NOT LIKE I WATCHED YOUR FUCKING REALITY SHOWS
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
It's not like my own lush fingernails are more interesting than Ellie Goulding's entire discography, or anything.
1d               
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KB @whiterussia
@cherry_lambrini this is one I like to call "WAG on holiday, pre-boob job and post-burger" pic.twitter.com/Vg9nCdpq37
1d in reply to cherry_lambrini               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
It's not like I've seen McFly live in the past ten years more times than I've hoovered my own carpet, or anything.
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
Okay so I've just seen a story that apparently Dougie from McFly is in a relationship with Ellie Goulding. Really trying to be calm.
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
*Spins to camera simultaneously, eye-fucks intensely* OOPS I! DID IT AGAIN TO YOUR HEART! GOT LOST IN THIS GAME OH BABY! OOPS YOU OOPS YOU
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
But I thought the old lady dropped it into the ocean in the end! Well, Edward, I went down and go it for you. AH YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE.
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
Edward...before you go I want to give you something. Oh it's beautiful! But wait a minute, isn't this? Yes, yes it is.
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
I'm watching my favourite video on YouTube. Nothing, and I mean, NOTHING, has ever made me as joyful as this. youtube.com/watch?v=WXQSk8…
1d               
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Finkowska @finkowska
@cherry_lambrini No. My resources of terror and loathing are more limitless than this universe.
1d in reply to cherry_lambrini               
1
Tillybean @tillyjean_
Just ate an entire share-bag of crisps by myself, because sharing is for the weak
1d               
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Abi @cherry_lambrini
@finkowska Isn't being so bitter all the time EXHAUSTING?
1d in reply to finkowska               
1
Effi Mai @EffiMai
"You've been tagged in 18 photos from last night by your sober friend!"

*shuts computer off and leaves the atmosphere
1d               
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9
Freya @FuzzCookies
Ben Fogle if he was a sex offender. #BGT
1d               
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James Rhodes @JRhodesPianist
Was about to watch #BGT before realising I could, in fact, shit in my hands and clap instead. Although that may get me through to the semis.
1d               
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AB @bottrill
Can you imagine if I knew about Tinder this time last year? I would have started a matadors on Tinder tumblr
1d               
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KB @whiterussia
I have purchased two dresses from this shop. This is my world now. I am someone who buys bandage dresses from places called "Celeb Boutique"
1d               
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Sook Min @lolitainmyarms
This is making me laugh so hard I can't even breathe I can't even explain why pic.twitter.com/npC3HBobnK
1d               
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3
Caroline @CarolineKent
@ronniejoice brilliant. And who the fuck are you?
1d in reply to ronniejoice               
2
Duchess Gummybuns @omgLSP
@rey_z his name includes "brobrobro"
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
David Fo$ter Wallets @DuncanVB
@rey_z @cherry_lambrini could be us but you playin
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Abi @cherry_lambrini
@rey_z Is it weird that your tweets remind me of a Jason Derulo song? (okay I'm sorry I'm so hilarious writing that tweet literally LOLed)
1d in reply to rey_z               
2
Tegan @BellJarred
pic.twitter.com/eNKxp6AD4Q
1d               
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Tillybean @tillyjean_
NO IM NOT ALWAYS ON TRAINS, only 90% of the time pic.twitter.com/eh5h5MQb2E
1d               
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Joni @joniosity
@rey_z I'm amused, but WHY do you keep doing it to yourself??
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
MissFit @itsmissfit
When your girlfriend does the worst thing she possibly could do to you. pic.twitter.com/BIjSS69wyr
1d               
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hannah victoria @hbvictoria90
hot boys who can sing are gonna kill me i s2g
1d               
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Brogan Ord Staunton @Thebroganator
@ihategenheron @rey_z forevaa and always bae <33
1d in reply to ihategenheron               
1
Horza Edeo @HorzaEdeo
Shopped. Not dead. Probably about 3 to 6 on my anxiety scale. Got complimented on my coat. Also, book! pic.twitter.com/CgXQ39a6gB
1d               
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James Rhodes @JRhodesPianist
At @michaelbartelle's new flat and impressed by his TV as art concept... Making laziness creative :) pic.twitter.com/D1lW2ViKae
1d               
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18
Tegan @BellJarred
@rey_z anthem m.youtube.com/watch?v=Xu-b3u…
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Domme Pérignon @_LaDiabla
My dream is to go out with someone with as high a sex drive as mine and spend all our time in bed drinking mojitos.
1d               
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Rachel @catsuitcity
#sext pic.twitter.com/sNULerNGgt
1d               
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Rosa @marxroadrunner
Oic.. RT@Independent: A bottle of wine a day is not bad for you & abstaining is worse than drinking, scientist claims
ind.pn/PfMCGt
1d               
2
1
George Allen @georgejallen
@rey_z @finkowska even as a prudish vegetarian, I am in agreement with this statement.
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Mrs Fong @themrsfong
@HorzaEdeo @rey_z I want to wash my eyes thoroughly having read it!
1d in reply to HorzaEdeo               
1
Charlie Steele @figureofalamb
@rey_z *waves hands to indicate disinterest because I've wasted too many years of my life dealing with men who don't understand no*
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Charlie Steele @figureofalamb
@rey_z nailed it
1d in reply to rey_z               
1
Fleppy Bard @twodecadeslate
vagenda formula: random subject + vague attempt to link to feminism x minimal knowledge of subject - readable prose x actual awfulness
1d               
9
13
Fleppy Bard @twodecadeslate
A think piece on RLC's relationship with instant coffee and how it informs her reading of intersectionality and other non sequitars
1d               
3
Tegan @BellJarred
I care so fucking little about Kate Middleton and where in the world she is at that a black hole of exhausted boredom is forming in my chest
1d               
24
5
Abi @cherry_lambrini
Can anyone recommend a good/cheap website for 'Carrie' style name necklaces? May or may not be asking as I want #fancy on a necklace.
1d               
1
Lex Talonted @LexingtonSteel
@jennifogg @rey_z pic.twitter.com/MO3hfc62kt
1d in reply to jennifogg               
2
Jenni @jennifogg
@rey_z pic.twitter.com/P0U6StMS0D
1d in reply to rey_z               
5
miseria cantare @weareglitter
seeing someone still trying to pull the "wah, i'm an innocent victim!" card when you know the exact bullshit they've pulled is infuriating.
2d               
1
Ginge @iconicpopstar
@rey_z *moans*
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
Badgerzukhova @bezukhova
Gonna wear my new watermelon skirt with my mint green tights. Because I can.
2d               
6
James @jpshaddock
@rey_z I do hope you're collating your OKCupid adventures for a book
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
Abi Wilkinson @AbiWilks
Just remembered when I spent like an hour making GIFs of tortoises trying to have sex with shoes.
2d               
7
1
hannah victoria @hbvictoria90
Just really wanna go for ice cream basically. Particularly sprinkles. Not really fussed on the boy part.
2d               
1
Thomas Penn @Tommypenn
@rey_z "0% match" thankfully.
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
Charlie Steele @figureofalamb
On the train. going to see @rey_z in less than three hours *bites own hand off in anticipation*
2d               
1
AB @bottrill
Call me a snob but one of life's greatest pleasures is being the first on the plane then judging all the peasants without priority boarding
2d               
6
Dorian, Rebel Rebel @thewildestsea
@rey_z at least you aren't covered in baby vom! #smallmercies
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
AB @bottrill
Imagine giving more than zilch fucks about what you look like in the airport
2d               
2
#JamiePhilipDavid @mmm_gash
I wish I was lying next to a cute guy who would then cuddle me into him and we'd fall asleep all cuddly and cute
2d               
1
#JamiePhilipDavid @mmm_gash
Mum is getting up for work and I'm sat eating an Easter egg and watching American Dad because I can't sleep after work
2d               
2
Andy @kidecono
OKCupid seems to be some sort of anarchist/socialist/feminist filtration device. I answer simple questions, and it throws me rad humans.
2d               
2
Dorian, Rebel Rebel @thewildestsea
The most liberating thing I ever did for myself, my sexuality and my gender was to stop trying to be attractive to cishet men.
2d               
5
2
Suzanne Darling @suzanne_langton
Social skills where do I buy them?! Is there a Groupon for that?
2d               
1
tuba mcconky @mama_tuna
my mum's troll friend just called me and my mum 'crisp ladies... crisp gals' ACCURATE 💃💃💃
2d               
7
Mr Del Bra @nundmc
FAO fans of crisps and twin peaks pic.twitter.com/DP0lETgfLQ
2d               
11
7
Andrew Jones @andrewj2009
Fun fact: my first facebook status was 'is snoop dogg'. I have not progressed since 2008.
2d               
9
1
Kim Karcrashian @doloreshaze
Here's a great pic of me and @Extremely_Moist in 20 years pic.twitter.com/FYQSp3HuhV
2d               
2
Edie Pig @_ediepeg
The Jemble life cannot be lived unjembly.
2d               
1
Edie Pig @_ediepeg
@bezukhova (he's especially predisposed to critique jemblism given his position in the inner circle of the jembles)
2d in reply to bezukhova               
1
Matthew Tindall @hungry_tindall
@rey_z Taking notes.
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
Edie Pig @_ediepeg
We've identified that all Richard Curtis films are told exclusively from the Jemble's perspective.
2d               
2
1
KB @whiterussia
@rey_z @bottrill He loves funding new backstreets? Does he work in planning for the local council? What a qt
2d in reply to rey_z               
1
AB @bottrill
@rey_z 36 yr old describes me as "quite cute", 'blowmare1' could look @ me forever & not get bored, a guy couldn't live w/o THE OXFORD COMMA
2d in reply to rey_z               
2
Enna @ennacooper
@sophie_gadd Not all books.
2d in reply to sophie_gadd               
1
AB @bottrill
@SamDiss can I start a tumblr of Sam Diss tweets that end in ", like.", like?
2d in reply to SamDiss               
3
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