We found 200 favorite tweets.
Well, might as well. Worst case scenario:
Wishful Async-ing: Sprinkling calls to dispatch_async everywhere hoping they'll make your app more responsive.
Very excited to be speaking at in March. Did you buy a ticket?
I'd be much more excited about the Amazon drone if it could deliver affordable health care.
I need a job to support my programming habit... :)
We appreciate it does not work for everybody, but unfortunately we can’t please all the people all the time.
Private schools don't need more money. Cut _their_ funding to the bare minimum, not public schools. This government is sick in the head.
In a Thanksgivukkah miracle, the oil lasted long enough to deep fry turkeys for 8 days.
in this overly cautious pre-simulated world we're losing these kinds of experiences. I hope my daughter will have those chances too!
Teenage hoodlums in Park Slope, sniffing gourmet teas.
If Kat visits Philly 4 seafood she's not leaving town w/o trying a combo
Use to annotate places in the real world, leave notes tagged to a specific geographic location
after watching the amazingness of , i wonder if we all need to spend more time ensuring the wishes of strangers come true?
the downside of course is that you’re *in* South Carolina.
I love this time of year, as college freshmen everywhere prepare to return home to educate their families about how the world really works.
I dunno, at least he knows to remind you?
Very gratifying morning drafting wills for low income neighbors at NCCU Law pro bono Wills Project.
Because of the great network, we made our dream app become reality! Have a look at
"Every decision you make as a business owner is never wrong. It is just a step to future right decisions." -
So sorry for their loss but what an epic story. Take 3 minutes and read this - - then go hug someone you love
Loving this site: I like the idea of a more storied, human approach to exploring new places.
come on just go into the DB and delete that tweet, you know you want to do it
The person that buys toothpaste from amazon would probably be tweeting from their apartment in their grandmas basement.
New post: Happy 19th birthday, Cocoa!
Joke’s on you, these days. :)
Try not to step in the leadership.
oh darlin'....you're my MOST favorite Finderee! To quote Taylor Swift, like ever! 😜
A thing to remember when traveling: your day is only as stressful as you let it be. If you're in an airport your life is probably just fine.
The $24 billion lost during the shutdown could have funded 80 miles of BART expansion ($300M/mi) or about half of California High Speed Rail
Some good news. :) RT : NSA data center in Utah has major electrical problems and basically isn't working.
but then if warnings are errors...
America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare and without the guns? (Recommended)
"Technical Debt" is shorthand for "we wanted to build a product, but the schedule dictated we build a ticking time bomb instead."
The day after (The day after the conference) I wanted to express my gratitude to all the Speakers and Attendees of the conference!
Back home from and . Awesome speakers, great people. Thanks !
It was great having you here! Have a save trip home. See you again next year! :)
"You shouldn't do everything all the times. You should use your brain." —
Those rules are stupid. That's the point. Why bother wether it's a Handy- or an Online-Ticket? (in 2013) //
Love this! RT : Hello, my name is Derek and I'm a addict. (And I'm deep in denial, so just let me be.)
Hello, my name is Derek and I'm a addict. (And I'm deep in denial, so just let me be.)
"...sticking out like a turd in a punch bowl." has a way with words.
brb, getting hacksaw from shed.
So many say, 'God is on our side' but I think In times of war, God is on no one's side except that of the widow, orphan, refugee & children
San Francisco as an island, thanks to the Colma Strait. (Seriously. 125,000 years ago.)
Dissuaded a Bay Area tourist in SF from going to Sacramento, and gave her sights in the East Bay and Marin. That was a close one...
Get drunk, launch Acorn, and just start clicking around until you have something. After the festival, the people will love it!
At my wife’s 40-year high school reunion. Related: who are all of these old people?
Almost 16 years ago, NASA launched the Cassini probe, so it could take this pale blue selfie of Earth.
$AAPL is up in after hours trading. Shit they should have taken the Dev Portal down ages ago!
Only use I know of for LinkedIn: adding ‘masturbation’ as a skill when someone leaves their computer unlocked, then endorsing them for it.
Y'alls mamas didn't raise you right.
you should totally prefix those framework classes with SK — no way will Apple ever use that prefix more than once… erm, twice… err…
Take tap water, add flavor, freeze, sell for $50/lb. You're still pushing bits and pixels?
Ever want to fly through space? This is pretty damn close. Watch in 4K, especially if you have a Retina MacBook Pro. VIDEO
The Six Million Dollar Man on the cover of TV Guide.
Lucia is short for Optimus Prime, right?
A public transit strike is CRIPPLING a primarily Internet based workforce. brb. Shedding an ironic tear.
Mention the word iPad and get immediately hit by iPad spammers.
If only I worked somewhere where I could solve these kinds of problems…
People joke that winter and summer in the Netherlands are the same, but that’s silly. Winter is cold, while summer is cold and rainy.
"At Apple, we pay attention to the smallest details."
In 2033 the then-president will retroactively pardon Snowden. We’ll all mutter “never again,” again.
Surely this is a noble enough cause for Anonymous.
Of all people, they’re sending you after Snowden?
You know the mushrooms are kicking in when you <objc/runtime.h>
So you know how ? That’s what’s going to happen with the new in .
Yes folks, 9 more seconds of video. Silicon Valley has still got it.
Been waiting for this for months now. So very excited. My new baby:
Everyone leaving SF don’t forget to take at least one hipster with you. We need your help cleaning up this town.
If you have to ask how many calories are in the cookie, maybe don’t get a cookie.
Yahoo Weather got a conciliation prize of an ADA for Apple copying their design for iOS 7
How nice of Apple to pre-sort all your photos for the NSA!
I love everything.
But those app icons.
The way we see it, a wrist-based iPhone capable of FaceTime would really live up to the word "watch."
Yes, I spent a solid two hours today setting up powerline-shell so that my terminal does THIS. Worth it.
Shit we can do: spy on everyone in the country. Shit we can't do: give them healthcare, education, finance, or jobs.
Obama announces national data backup service during Tim Cook's keynote, just to be a dick.
This is a traffic sign in Mexico.
The point is, NSA probably knows what Apple is announcing at WWDC, so can one of you guys reading this tweet give the rumor sites a call?
It's poLLo people not poYo
Check your neighbors' tweets
is he pitching a douche app? maybe he's in character?
2nd prize: $500 Chipotle gift card.
1st prize: $0 Chipotle gift card.
yah, but then we’d be in Dallas
I want to do a talk on mobile client-side modeling/caching of server data so I can be first to apply the term "Little Data" in that context.
The should scrutinize every 501(c)4 org. Tax-exempt status is a privilege, not a right. Prove you're worth it.
A fearless worker on the unfinished Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco. Ca 1935
The biggest Glassholes in world have all locked themselves into a single building in downtown San Francisco.
Our opportunity is now.
you just awoke in a corner of a club?
That's so cute. I'm sure they appreciated a nice shower. Then you let them go on their way? Wait...CLEANING means WHAT?!!
My nephew getting an early start on his percussion training. :) VIDEO
Why does something tell me that this is NOT high on their priority list?
Brainstorming ways to synergize big data and the cloud -- conceptualizing leveraging the hivemind in the twittersphere.
Paris’ La périphérique [ring road] was built on the vestiges of the 19th c. Thiers wall.
Dear all websites: stop putting delayed popups over your content which never scale properly on mobile.
Two stories back-to-back in flipboard
It's finally done… My blog post about implementing FTS in a Cocoa application which uses Core Data is now available:
Show me on this doll where touched you.
Oh you’re going to fit in just _fine_ at Google. Hating the user is raison d’état there.
Tomorrow, Valley Girl is 30 years old. Back then, that would have been like us watching some movie from 1954.
My first WWDC was a student scholarship, now I work at Apple on UIKit. I encourage you to apply:
OH: "They could have come... the penises could have come."
Apple should put an adsense banner in the maintenance page, and reduce the price of the WWDC ticket.
no, the correct answer is NSNumber shouldn't exist.
I tell people I'm going to Amsterdam this summer and they make weed jokes. Um, I live in San Francisco.
Happy amateur day, everyone. Be watchful of the stoned drivers. #420
It partly solves Twitter's difficulty of knowing more about you.
pandas. empanadas. <em>pandas</em>. hmm.
Waiting for 3rd awesome thing to happen today: 1) deletion of app ids 2) Thatcher finally doing the decent thing 3) ?
How PBR actually got its blue ribbon:
if you hate someone, endorse them on linkedin for SOAP APIs and waterfall methodologies
A very happy birthday to the almost fossilised .
Also based on the size of the Prophet’s footprint we can assume Mohammad had no trouble keeping his eleven wives happy.
For April Fools Day, I'm going to make a site where people fight about who's pet is cutest.
“Inject a healthy dose of Web Scale convenience into your app” this is amazing.
Same student, different schools.
Everyone suffering from diseases and natural disasters: hang in there, we're liking Facebook posts as fast as we can.
Dude, wake up! You're sleeptweeting again! ;)
So, yeah... A new to me 2nd cousin. Go, .
You know who you should be thanking? That waitress who got a camera-lens-concussion in the name of your snark photography. 😜
Hilarious. Maybe we can start “Sponsor a developer for just pennies a day” cc:
More people have walked on the moon than have done anything that’s been done by 11 or less people.
Smart people, party games, drinks and a tarot card reader = best Saturday afternoon ever, w the great people at
Try asking around at work. :-)
True, but a taco for me is a sad burrito replacement. I use the extra room for more beer. Seems to be working out OK.
The US government is like a special version of Kickstarter for wealthy people.
Met at SXSW 13 years ago. Best schwag I took home from a conference.
It's unfortunate WebObjects for Objective-C doesn't still exist, tge many legions of iOS devs could re-use that skill.
heading up the new Pithy Snark Department?
Umm, remember how I said the beans were "coming up" this morning?
this takes white whine to new heights.
31 speakers from 13 nations served by 6 staffers for the 5th year running—there's only one
Those are real Diet Coke tears, btw!
Finally the penknife I've travelled with for years and never needed came in handy
Knucking fackered! Crashing out early tonight
Fantastic to by . So courageous, and vulnerable. Rare chance to learn from others experiences of failure.
each scaffold was exercised under the debugger as it was installed.
Making claims without supporting evidence used to be called "intellectual laziness." Now it's called "Twitter."
It really is a load of shit that helping eat all the guacamole isn't a valid path to citizenship.
their kids are older than yours. And we have a cleaning service. I mean they. They have a cleaning service.
Look on the bright side, SF friends. Those African kids are going to _love_ those championship jerseys.
Dear China, if you managed to get a copy of my Tweets that are more than three months old, please send me a copy. Thanks! --Nat
there is no time to question things when you’re a startup! Questions slow you down!
Trombone quartet covers ‘Carry On Wayward Son’ // So awesome. Also, watch the camera guy getting down at ~2 min.
The street finds its own uses for hipster startups? (As per )
One year ago tonight, I almost died from an illness I had battled for a decade.
Don’t waste a moment.
Operation "Buff as Fuck", day 1, plan:
1) Join a gym
2) Order a Withings WiFi scales
3) Don't eat all the pies
I present the finished article
OH: “They should market physical servers to hipsters. They’re like the vinyl version of The Cloud.”
On this day in 1969, Boris Bolynov, the 1st Jew in space, survived the worst space re-entry ever.
Listening to hardcore Ruby/Rails guys talk about OOP is pretty interesting. Glad I use Obj-C.
That's why he isn't anymore Apple CEO “John Sculley says Apple needs cheap iPhone for emerging smartphone markets ”
looking forward to the gmail cappuccino rewrite!
we'd all be broken if we kept getting you housewarming presents.
Tweeps, I will spare you the string of pure foul mouth invective I uttered to the bozos at ESPN. It was ugly. It was foul. It was heartfelt
Happy holidays to all! I hope you're able to spend time with those you love. Tell them you love them and be thankful for what you have.
The metadata is the message.
San Francisco absurdity level increased.
Finishing up my last day at . Excited to get to work at tomorrow:
Stop acting like we have ‘rights’ on Facebook
by 9:35 you would have already milked the cows, made some candles, and coffee hadn’t been invented yet. No thanks!
c'est des patrons de PME qui devraient etre assis autour de la table plutot que tous ces politicards déconnectés
Due to the cold weather, this was bison chili night. I am all warmed up. Here was my mise en place prior to cooking:
I wish Facebook had a 140 character limit on posts as well.
Coding with a glass of wine on a Saturday night. Like a bloody rock star I tell you. Minus the sex. And drugs. And perhaps the rock.
Illustrated that their algorithm was not scalable by throwing 256 more decks into the heap. O(n log n) = tears. Parenting at its best.
Jo was able to uncross her legs twice this evening! Better every day!
Acorn, you say the image is 144x144; Xcode, you say it isn’t. One of you is lying. Fucking fight it out between yourselves & get back to me.
I launched the Mac version of Construction Cost Estimator today. Let me know if you want a promo code.
The nice thing about Android’s face recognition sign in is that my murderer will be able to use my Nexus 7 after I’m gone.
Alternative to idea: modifying someone’s npm package to depend on hoarders… Game on.
Some labor progress, finally, before midnight. Many shouts out for modern medicine. Looks like and I'll meet our baby today!
The new iMacs are now on sale.
Just worked out the cost. To get a fully spec’d 1 I have to sell 11,200 copies of my App.
Once I write it.
Après deux ans de projet, Horizon est LIVE aujourd'hui !
Not buying a Twinkie this morning in solidarity.
be sure to pickup your gun at immigration.
32 and I have an earlier curfew than when I was a little kid. National Guard doesn't play. They're like your parents, but with machine guns.
this is what the morning after an evening with looks like
What a great training week! I am happy the guys were super happy and now really full of energy to start writing their apps.
TO BAD YOU NEVER GOT LAID CONGRATS ANYWAYS
Drunk Nate Silver arrested for shouting "FIRST ASIAN PRESIDENT" at the stomach of a woman unaware of her pregnancy.
New Hampshire has all female statewide leadership— governor, senators, congresswoman —live free or die, bitcheszss!!!! :D
Cut to Obama and Biden silently eating schwarma.
I loved that speech!! Finally, truly feel what being an American should feel like: included, proud and ready to give.
No matter what you think of Romney, can we please stop with the childish ad-hominem attacks? I’ve heard enough of those for a while. Thanks.
My write in candidate is ' OR 1=1; DROP TABLE VOTES--
“We will not use court-ordered public statements as an opportunity for wry commentary on our competition. We will not use court-ordered ...”