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ImageNameLocationTwitter sinceLinks
DefaultGatewayNew Zealand2011-11-30
@Jack9eight51,007 days
I'm a genuine Kiwi that eats, roots, shoots and leaves. If you are a buzz kill, please go away. I follow @stephvelander
FollowersFollowingTweetsListsFavorites
4,2044,30213,49232593,809
We found 196 favorite tweets.
Humphrey U. Bogart @UBogart
@silverbreezey @smokethegood420 @Jack9eight5 @420iloveweed @LilRob1218 @This_Josh_guy @ThirstForPeace ... Thx Breezey :-) Yall StayLifted !!
64d in reply to silverbreezey               
3
TheBeardedDude© @ThirstForPeace
@silverbreezey @This_Josh_guy @LilRob1218 @420iloveweed @Jack9eight5 @UBogart @smokethegood420 Ty darlin' (:-)}}
64d in reply to silverbreezey               
3
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
#F_Specialツ & #ShoutOut @smokethegood420 @UBogart @Jack9eight5 @420iloveweed @LilRob1218 @This_Josh_guy @ThirstForPeace
#legalizemarijuana
64d               
4
1
TeamDR_music @TeamDR_music
TY Hon :) @hrstump @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
66d in reply to hrstump               
3
Josh - Dj Phage @DjPhage
#FF @Schroofles @diskgrinder @That_Damn_Duck @allforandrea @OGJeffrey_ @Jack9eight5 @kseniaanske @DarkAngelRafael @TheKevinButler
73d               
1
Stef @Stefeenew
@MaskedBandita morning love morning @YarnBallClock hi friends @Jack9eight5
73d               
2
Stef @Stefeenew
@Jack9eight5 hi Jack :-)
75d in reply to Jack9eight5               
1
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
I can't stop listening MC Hammer. He's too legit. To quit.
Hahahahahhahaha.

I saw Canadian films tonight
76d               
3
3
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
Wings is better than The Beatles pic.twitter.com/vjb2KQmwgt
76d               
5
1
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
I walked today for health reasons I have nothing to say back to Rt
76d               
3
1
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
Modest Mouse
76d               
6
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
You're opinion and my disagreement of your opinion is what fuels cars and keeps homes warm in the winter.
77d               
7
2
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
The cops tried pulling me over and I was like... pic.twitter.com/64VNL0ZzKv
77d               
9
2
Stef @Stefeenew
#colorof the week hi @MaskedBandita pic.twitter.com/8FB378AMtr
77d               
2
1
FART ROBOT @fart_robot
RT @Jack9eight5 Definition of Surprise- A Fart with a lump in it. FART ROBOT APPROVES.
77d in reply to Jack9eight5               
1
Stef @Stefeenew
Morning all coffee is brewing
77d               
1
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
Guess it's too late for this meme pic.twitter.com/35iiFj083k
77d               
13
4
Chris @shubshub11
Thank you guys so much for 100+ Subscribers it means alot to me, The 100 subscriber special should be up by the end of the week
78d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Son me n granddaughter 🇬🇧 pic.twitter.com/TciOE8BpJb
78d               
22
1
Chris @shubshub11
youtube.com/user/shubshub11 @Jack9eight5 #gamedev #indiedev guys we are at 99 subscrubbers right now just 1 more for 100 subscrubber special
78d               
4
5
Stephanie V Anderson @stephvelander
My exhusbands new girlfriend was in my old kitchen washing dishes and all of the sudden... I didn't feel so bad about being single.
80d               
16
2
Howard Stump @hrstump
#FF @TeamDR_music @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
80d               
3
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Why isn't flour made of flowers 😃
81d               
1
1
TheGrumblingGargoyle @LynnGerrard
I hold a sadness
That's unshifting
I hold a hurt
That lingers on
I hold a memory
Of our yesterdays
I hold a heartache
For times long gone
82d               
12
12
TeamDR_music @TeamDR_music
TY Howard :) @hrstump @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
87d in reply to hrstump               
4
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
The new Blonde me as promised pic.twitter.com/58zq9q1Pkf
87d               
15
3
Victor Alonso @vittorpia
@hrstump @TeamDR_music @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @denverfoodguy Gracias!
87d in reply to hrstump               
3
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
DIZZY Debbie
DESPERATE Dan
TINY Tim
PLAIN Jane
HAPPY Harry
WHATS IN A NAME ⁉️
Well mines true ✔️- who do you know?
88d               
1
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
You can't suit all the ppl all of the time❗️
SAVE YOUR PRECIOUS TIME ❗️and don't even bother. Look after number1 YOU✔️
88d               
1
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Now- I don't care if you agree or disagree , BUT ❗️
FLY'ZZZZZZZZZZZ CAN DRIVE U FUKIN MAD❗️❗️❗️
88d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
If I die B4 I wake -
I pray TheLord Not2Take
Anything I'veSaid downAsEvident
AlTho I mayHv Bin a Kent
IvGiven n Taken💩
But my👐 R cleanOfiT
89d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
If you don't believe in GOD you can LIE in court ❗️
And that's why the LAW is a CROCK of SHIT ⁉️💩
Well HeeeeeeLloWa ❗️
89d               
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
I don't get WHY - PPL who hear voices in their heads ... Do as their TOLD⁉️
They don't ADHERE to FUKall else in life❗️
90d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
@Jack9eight5 Thanx for all your support 👋 ;)
97d in reply to debbie_teale               
1
The Swedish El Jefe @dxblarssonENG
You say OCD like it's a bad thing.

*licks your avi 8 times*
98d               
13
7
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Leaving behind silent*
Frigid mountaintops*
Vanishing snow lines*
To summers*
Sweltering heat
#haikuchallenge #poetheme #micropoetry #poem
98d               
11
2
Jess Stratton @jess_stratton
I don't want to be a better person.
I'd miss you.
98d               
19
7
The Swedish El Jefe @dxblarssonENG
Tongue piercing and jorts is not gay if you're having a mid life crisis.
98d               
7
2
Alley Cat @deardilettante
You are my forever never.
98d               
56
32
Srikar Reddy @Ac_in_quest
Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot about me, nothing is going to get better.
98d               
8
3
The Swedish El Jefe @dxblarssonENG
Mom says I'm not allowed to be on twitter any more cause I keep spoiling dinner by feeding of attention.
98d               
13
3
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Summer love*
Without logic*
Silent promises*
Made for*
Infinite heartache
#poetheme #orjay #haikuchallenge #xbwg #5lines
98d               
25
6
Lisa x• @lisamck87
You might be cool but you'll never be "epic song plays everytime I enter the room" cool

- Darth Vader
98d               
6
1
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Night swooped*
Covering day*
Silent..infinite
#darkside #xbwg #haikuchallenge #haiku #sixwords #3lines
98d               
10
1
Lisa x• @lisamck87
I mean, I like you but if zombies were chasing us both I'd totally trip you up
98d               
8
2
eshan @eshurne
I came home, I saw my bed, I changed my plans.
98d               
129
161
Just Jan @janr572
That was the quickest follow/unfollow in the history of twitter. I feel a little violated.....or maybe it was a ninja
98d               
7
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Stars*
Only thing cislunar*
Between two balls*
(heh,heh) ;-)
#artwiculate #haiku #senryu #shortstory #poem ? #3lines
98d               
7
1
Anderson Q Gomes @andy061182
ThnX & #FF back to @silverbreezey & @URaBogart @TravLeBlanc @InnHuman @Jack9eight5 @jeffreyvanclea1 @LOUD_Thoughts_ @jkrambles @JOE__11
101d in reply to silverbreezey               
4
Humphrey U. Bogart @UBogart
@silverbreezey @TravLeBlanc @iGreenMonk @InnHuman @Jack9eight5 @jeffreyvanclea1 @LOUD_Thoughts_ @jkrambles @JOE__11 @andy061182 thx breezey
101d in reply to silverbreezey               
6
TeamDR_music @TeamDR_music
TY Howard :) @hrstump @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
101d in reply to hrstump               
2
Cosmic JOE @JOE__11
@silverbreezey @URaBogart @TravLeBlanc @iGreenMonk @InnHuman @Jack9eight5 @jeffreyvanclea1 @LOUD_Thoughts_ @jkrambles @andy061182 //<3
101d in reply to silverbreezey               
5
Josh - Dj Phage @DjPhage
#FF @Schroofles @diskgrinder @That_Damn_Duck @allforandrea @OGJeffrey_ @Jack9eight5 @kseniaanske @DarkAngelRafael @TheKevinButler
101d               
1
Stef @Stefeenew
#ffbeautifulfriends @MaskedBandita @YarnBallClock @Wabit_ @ScruffyBollocks @Jack9eight5
101d               
2
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Saying goodbye to my Avi me.. And hello too the new me later today
I'm going back to the oldMe BLONDE👏
I was blonde4Don🔑s yrs I'm scared
102d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
IVE BEEN LOST IN A NEVER ENDING CIRCLE OF ... Altermated phoneSystem ⁉️
Eventually once I gotThrough they were Gonna 💩miracles 2noAvail❗️👋👈
103d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
On the other ✋
🆔👈life gaveU a 🔡Voice
AgodGivenRight 4A choice
U have a mind
Speak it
Don't ever take any 💩T❗️
104d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
You read the 📰's
Believe Wot U C
How bout 1Day it effects U n Me❓
Let's stay in our🏰's
Keep our👄thS SHUT❗️
Those with a BigGob get there 💩🔪T
104d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
A-Spirity-Sancty- a trickiTy Boo
LookIn2My👀's while I Preach2U
Ur away with theFairy's
Ur back in theRoom
AllGoodWives rideOnA Broom❗️👊
104d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
The Atlantic's cold- Pacific warm- you were created from liquid spurt
You survived in a Cacoon of fluid until you were 9monthsOld =Yu❤️T🏊C
104d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Nobody likes me- everybody hates me
I'm going down the garden to eat Worms ❗️
106d               
1
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
If man is derivative of Woman... How come son isn't so of Daughter... Except when Child ⁉️
👹👺
107d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
#chihuahua #watering instagram.com/p/oG_iGTBsvL/
107d               
1
TeamDR_music @TeamDR_music
@hrstump Ty <3 @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
108d in reply to hrstump               
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
I'm having council pop- in a Birmingham glass ⁉️
AKA ... Tap water in a Mug ❗️. 🚱💦
108d               
2
Josh - Dj Phage @DjPhage
#FF @Schroofles @diskgrinder @That_Damn_Duck @allforandrea @OGJeffrey_ @Jack9eight5 @kseniaanske @DarkAngelRafael @TheKevinButler
108d               
2
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
This was my neighbours tea ❗️ errrghhhh they didn't tickle that trout 👋👈 instagram.com/p/oECVsahsnw/
108d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
#chihuahua #lionheart #lionking chihuahua and Lion stand off stare out instagram.com/p/oEAs-cBslF/
108d               
1
Howard Stump @hrstump
#FF @TeamDR_music @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
108d               
5
5
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
I HATE BREAD WHEN ITS THE CONSISTENCY OF CAKE ⁉️ 🍞🍰
110d               
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
@Jack9eight5 great talent. And any M8 of yours- is good recommendation👍
112d in reply to Jack9eight5               
1
AngelComedian @AngelComedian
Thanks for showing me your mom.
113d               
6
1
Nobody's Girl @solo_red_cup
My friend passed out and woke up with a trail of chips leading from the table, and bean dip all over him and the chair.
113d               
15
9
Kyle @sonofcosby
We've been poking each other on Facebook, so you could say things are getting pretty serious.
114d               
1
Randolph Duke @CelebYouTaunt
I'm just gonna say what we're all thinking:I bet Jesus had a big dick.
114d               
3
Randolph Duke @CelebYouTaunt
Thanks for playing. Good times.
114d               
5
2
tarun kumar @tarunkmr145
If u gona ignore me I'm nt responsible fr ur injuries
114d               
2
1
The Dave @OlofsonArcade
I should probably have a nap before everyone wakes up and starts making noise...
114d               
5
DWB @durtywhiteboy
Your mom.

That's the joke.
114d               
70
43
Déjà Vù © @P8NT4R
I love nothing more than working all week just so I can do all my chores on Sunday.... Just to hate Mondays that little bit more.
114d               
29
4
Liliana_XO @LilianaXO
Sext. pic.twitter.com/ZTiWizFoB5
114d               
58
4
Travis LeBlanc @TravLeBlanc
My personal assistant just got through reading all the hate mail sent in from Anti-Cute Bitch activists when a new batch of mail came in.
114d               
56
13
Rock @URdreamingnow
Satin chocolate pie > Sat in chocolate pie
114d               
2
1
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
Weirdos that sharpie their eyebrows save some dick for the rest of us!
114d               
17
3
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
Maybe it's maybeline maybe it's sharpie
114d               
27
24
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
I better get at least 30 fucking trophy wives for that tweet!
114d               
11
1
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
I bet if I worked at mcdonalds instead of at the quikie mart I'd have more followers!
114d               
18
4
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
Wipe your mouth!
114d               
8
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
Lady just bought 3 bags of 25lb cat food. Which one of you elite bitches did I just ring out?
114d               
28
9
Maderchaud @mahatmatweeter
I thought I was saving all my great tweets for when I reached this far in twitter.
114d               
15
3
Nobody's Girl @solo_red_cup
I want one of those toilets that cleans itself.

Do we have that yet?
114d               
5
1
TeamDR_music @TeamDR_music
Ty hon :) @hrstump @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
115d in reply to hrstump               
2
Josh - Dj Phage @DjPhage
#FF @Schroofles @diskgrinder @That_Damn_Duck @allforandrea @OGJeffrey_ @Jack9eight5 @kseniaanske @DarkAngelRafael @TheKevinButler
115d               
2
Howard Stump @hrstump
#FF @TeamDR_music @BluesVideos @ShawnUpchurch @marshallholland @Politics_PR @Jack9eight5 @KurtzLR @glennjhull @vittorpia @denverfoodguy
115d               
2
2
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
A River runs into the Ocean,
Eventually so will You
It feels soNatural when u Go
Ya dip ur Toe-N then you know
Your life began in a FLOW
115d               
2
1
Ellen-Simone-Eyden @debbie_teale
Is it a bird- a plane, NO ITS A FAKIN SNAIL CLIMBING UP ME WONDOW ! ;) pic.twitter.com/8NSV1GJkyl
116d               
5
Imaginary Friend™ @TheDaybreaker
@Jack9eight5 thanks partner!! Seems like. I'm gonna play my sister's assassin's creed copy
116d in reply to Jack9eight5               
1
Anna Banana @irememberfallin
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." ~ Aristotle
116d               
23
8
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Darkness flashing light*
Branched trees,shadowed arms*
Day succumbs to nights mystery
#DarkSide #micropoetry #poetry #haiku #twaiku
117d               
8
Milquetoast @BlueRobotDesign
Wonder if anyone’s ever died in your house and/or bedroom.
117d               
9
3
Apson @Apson
“Maybe this world is another planet’s hell.”
― Aldous Huxley
117d               
1
Harish Muralidhar @TinSoldier90
Just saw a packed tata nano scale a flyover successfully
#NotBad
117d               
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
Of course I like rugby. I like watching sweaty men in most capacities.
117d               
6
3
Rachel (Red) @MyRedHairIsReal
You must be exhausted as much as you run through my mind..
117d               
11
1
Just Jan @janr572
I've informed the boss
117d               
2
Just Jan @janr572
If tonight's answer is yes, there will be celebrations. If no - me in the ultimate mumma bear fury
Either way, I'll be hungover tomorrow
Lol
117d               
5
Shaun Right Now @ShaunRightNow
My grandma thinking 'the mile high club' is a travel game is great... her asking out loud to play it on the plane to see relatives, was not.
117d               
57
12
Wonder Kitten @Tw1tter_K1tten
Twitter because Facebook revealed that most of my family members are bigots with big mouths.
117d               
37
13
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I saved you in my phone as "Captain Classy" . It was the moustache.
117d               
6
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
You know, i'm naked about 94% of the time i'm on here.
117d               
11
1
Chris @shubshub11
Merry Christmas
117d               
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
If they ever base a fairytale off of my life, it better have lots of rock music, magic potions, eligible princes, & a self-esteem issue.
117d               
7
4
heather damage @HeatherDamage
Moose and gators and bears. Oh my!
117d               
4
SassSlinger @sass_slinger
Being a woman means being unbreakable.
117d               
97
55
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
Can I protest something by not getting out of bed?
117d               
8
7
Curt. @FrankCurtisB
That rustling you hear is me in the bushes outside your window.
117d               
11
4
PoliticallyILL1 @PoliticallyILL1
Randy Jackson is such a hanger-on.
117d               
2
Ryan Gosling the 3rd @SuchaDumbWorld
Words can be powerful.
Especially when they're inked into my fist.
117d               
16
3
ygpryd @ygpryd
hopefully you do something productive today
117d               
3
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
His beauty*
Was in his fiction*
How he opened*
And played*
In my mind
#orjay #haikuchallenge #tanka #ShortStory #micropoetry
117d               
9
3
Imaginary Friend™ @TheDaybreaker
Can someone tell me please if I can play used games on my ps4?? Thank u
117d               
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
Phones that charge with sexual innuendo & sarcasm
117d               
4
1
Liliana_XO @LilianaXO
Get off work so you can get off with me.
117d               
55
13
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
What is sex like when you are sober?
117d               
11
2
Heron @HeronSays
It’s like, you go out for this amazing life-altering BBQ but inevitably it all goes to shit.
117d               
9
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I am having my tramp-stamp tribal tattoo changed into a sign that reads "2001 was a confusing time for me".
117d               
9
1
Hopeless Scotty @HunterEastonPo
The beauty of dying with a needle in your arm.
117d               
7
Wonder Kitten @Tw1tter_K1tten
But Crystal Meth sounds so pretty
117d               
807
447
Pugaboo Gangsta @LuvPug
You need regrets in life to learn lessons, but you also need to let go of regrets to move forward.
117d               
342
210
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I had no idea there was a draft folder.
117d               
1
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
My mind U open*
Plethora of possibilities*
Fiction to stimulated friction*
Of beauty in heart
#haikuchallenge #orjay
@TheRKVarma TY :)
117d in reply to TheRKVarma               
13
3
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Magic of music*
Never to cease*
Sensually stimulating*
Mind,body*
Opens heart
#poetheme #5prompt #haikuchallenge #poetry
@joannesJan TY:)
117d in reply to joannesJan               
4
Anna Banana @irememberfallin
Without the internet, it was difficult to know what I needed to worry about.
117d               
20
3
Sassafrantz @Sassafrantz
If you don't know how to get to Pound Town, I'll be happy to give you directions.
120d               
60
13
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
and kisses! don't forget the kisses!
120d               
5
2
Unorthodox Gentleman @utxgent
No one talks about it, but we all know that at every movie we go to, someone is in the theater receiving oral sex concluded by ejaculation!
120d               
1
thenardslova @craberita
I exercise for the chocolate.
120d               
1
Drunk Engine @jbyrd099
When someone unfollows me, I like to think God needed another angel.
120d               
1
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
he laid down...thank God...
120d               
1
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
OMG, this old, blind dog walks back and forth, back and forth; "Long walk to nowhere"...

constant cardio...LAY DOWN! pic.twitter.com/Zn5wHKfZpx
120d               
16
Miniwheats @Miniwheats2012
Hide people, Monday is coming!
120d               
27
14
skullpuppy @skullpuppy11
They say you can't get blood from a stone, but actually you can. The problem though is Keith's is pretty much toxic.
120d               
15
3
heather damage @HeatherDamage
C'mon girl. Let's go get us some food. pic.twitter.com/ophJMmTmnQ
120d               
14
1
Sassafrantz @Sassafrantz
The only thing standing between me and true love is I'm single and loving it.
120d               
71
24
Jennifer @ZingingCutie
"I love you, and I have a condom."
Smooth line, bro. Bet you've had that very same condom for awhile now.
120d               
7
2
Miniwheats @Miniwheats2012
I don't always look like my avi, I just clean up pretty well
120d               
46
21
Sassafrantz @Sassafrantz
I've made some pretty bad choices in life. Don't look for a punch line.
120d               
48
16
Nobody's Girl @solo_red_cup
Q: Why are men against marriage?
Daniel Tosh: Marriage is for gay people - and women.
120d               
1
Jennifer @ZingingCutie
About to watch "The Uninvited." Going on the title alone, it sounds like the story of my life.
120d               
3
LoDub @LKDub_11
Apparently Miley Cyrus is calling herself a martyr. Except for that, you have to be dead, crazy lady
*begins waiting hopefully & patiently
120d               
1
Sarcasmic @Sarcasmicfiend
Kid across the street calls his friends the N word so much that Wu-Tang Clan jumped outta his trunk to show him who's not to be fucked with.
120d               
9
2
jamie @_sweet_ham
I know what love is

It's like having someone to take the trash out and sex and stuff.
120d               
78
30
Karina @KarinaLausen
No the Great White Shark isn't "mistaking" you for a seal or a fish. You are on the menu too.
120d               
5
LoDub @LKDub_11
Wearing my favorite pants on my favorite holiday means no farting. that would be a travesty to the pants the holiday pic.twitter.com/wNDZymEIQA
120d               
2
Jennifer @ZingingCutie
Is it just me, or do all of your stories seem to end with, "And then the three of us went to a strip club"?
120d               
10
5
jamie @_sweet_ham
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
120d               
162
78
Jennifer @ZingingCutie
I think you'd be glad later if you weren't here now.
120d               
3
Sly @slyoung5
Why Barbie is lucky:
1) No nipples, stays warm
2) All clothes are bought for her
3) Knees don't bend
4) No vagina - doesn't get used for sex
120d               
81
11
Rachel (Red) @MyRedHairIsReal
Let your words heal and not wound
120d               
22
12
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
I've had enough of nature this week, planting, weeding, tilling...naw..It's only 79 in here; 85 out there.
120d               
1
Misnomer @DoneEffedUp
Don't you hate it when you make a new friend at the park but then their asshole owners don't let you visit their dog at home
120d               
6
1
Silverbreezey @silverbreezey
Struggles daily in mind*
Fights,fear,terror to hold on*
To his last grain of memory
#orjay #HelpChallengedChildren pic.twitter.com/RafGFEBX7I
120d               
11
5
Christina Chandler @ladyike316
Odd how if you like yourself and others actions don't get to you they think you don't care. Just not responsible for how others act!!
120d               
1
Misnomer @DoneEffedUp
Pop a few vitamins, take a swig of vodka, BAM! breakfast at 6 pm again
120d               
5
Hassan -el-Toleton ™ @MrToleton
Say it to my face not through your tweet.
120d               
10
11
Just Jan @janr572
Teens fed and on their way to line up for the 5 Seconds of Summer concert.

Now I do the mum thing and worry till I pick them up tonight
120d               
3
RUGDNIT? @Lama911
So... Just curious... What card do Redheads get to play?

Asking for... Me.
120d               
10
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
Liquor store doesn't open until tomorrow...

may run into some serious problems tonight.. back to that whole cardio thang
120d               
3
1
JJAAKKEE @Jake1000001
Ask a crazy person about his day and there goes the rest of your life.
120d               
21
3
heather damage @HeatherDamage
Now is the time when we join together and eat Pho.
120d               
4
heather damage @HeatherDamage
We had a little cry together on the top of the hill.
120d               
3
1
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I put the RT in REGRET.
120d               
5
1
Misnomer @DoneEffedUp
People bitching about stupid shit that annoys them are just as fucking annoying as what annoys them.
120d               
4
1
Sardonic Tart @SardonicTart
Sunday night is my favorite night to sit and wonder where my life went wrong.
120d               
19
12
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
I worry for hours if I'm going to die of a heart attack for cardio...
120d               
1
StellaNoir @stellanoir32
I'm not always happy with the decisions my vagina makes but I stick by her because she's gorgeous
120d               
54
19
TheDollyLama @AnyaLachae7
True story. 10-" Hurry come help! 12 just broke her vagina dancing!"
120d               
11
2
Naughty but nice... @jaslakhmna
I run to McDonald's for cardio...
120d               
63
18
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I'm always on the good side.
120d               
5
1
Christina Chandler @ladyike316
Beautiful Day so peaceful. Drinking a cold beer and playing in the flower bed. Serenity .
120d               
1
dani @tokenchick13
Been a while since the TWPD complimented me about the show. And now I'm all extra super fucking happy and shit. 😆
120d               
5
Run Clyde, Run @clyderun
She loves me only for my penis puppet.
120d               
4
Kimber Depp™© @truegemini13
What about dig dug?

ok, I spent a LOT of time in bars...had to do something...
120d               
2
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
That's not the kind of sharpshooter I was looking for.
120d               
4
Robyn @Robyn226
Can someone tell me when exactly the avocado became the tyrant of the fruit world?
120d               
2
Censored Girl @Girl_Censored
I will always bet on you finishing first.
Please make me finally lose this bet.
120d               
4
1
Milquetoast @BlueRobotDesign
Bitch you sharin’ a table with us at Buffalo Wild Wings watching the fight, you ain’t Mayweathers cousin.
120d               
8
Root Beer @MrNickJC
Not going to dance at this wedding.

*gets pulled into the conga line*

Damn it!
120d               
32
7
AshMonster @AshleyHense
Finally the batteries in my scale died! I'm FREEEEEE
120d               
21
5
Fuckwittery @chapsmyanus
Weird things about driving in America;
•Rear indicators are red
•Drivers rarely indicate
•U-turns are permitted at traffic lights
120d               
4
Dazzledginger @dazzledginger
I'll play along
120d               
33
17
Naughty but nice... @jaslakhmna
I seek revenge for cardio...
120d               
38
8
Fuckwittery @chapsmyanus
Weird things about American apartments;
•No ceiling lights
•Lino in the bathroom
•Power points don't have switches
120d               
7
dani @tokenchick13
Sorry golf fans...if I was at this tournament I'd pull a total Jackass. #AirHorn
120d               
5
Fuckwittery @chapsmyanus
How is it that a shot off the post isn't counted as a shot on goal, but if the puck goes in off the post it is?
120d               
3
Fuckwittery @chapsmyanus
The more you learn about a game, the more critical you become about the play.
120d               
7
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