We found 194 favorite tweets.
It's cool when you run your mouth on here and no one can care less.
No matter what, stay classy.
I don't get why people judge you when you first met when they don't even know the real you
Learn to appreciate what you have, before time forces you to appreciate what you had.
So, I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium are going out, and I was all like, OMg.
It's cute when couples act like bestfriends or when bestfriends act like couples.
Sorry for caring. Sorry for trying. Sorry for it all. But most of all, I'm sorry I let you in.
Here's to the girls that got their heart broken by a guy that they never even dated.
Relationships last long when two people decide they will never give up on each other.
I don't trust easily, so when I tell you I trust you, please don't make me regret it.
All I ever wanted was to be the reason you smile.
It's always nice to have someone in your life that makes you smile even when they're not around.
I remember when we used to talk everyday, i miss that.
My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.
I don't have a dirty mind, I simply have a sexy imagination :-)
God gave me 10 fingers, each with something different to do. Thumbs for wars, pinkies for swears and the middle one is just for you.
I always say shit before I think.
A little bit of jealousy in a relationship is healthy, it's always nice to know someone's afraid to lose you.
Texting something you know you'll regret and closing your eyes when you send it.
The less I care, the happier I am.
When I kill a bug, I never clean it up. I leave it's body there as a reminder to the other bugs.
I hate when people be like "Guess what" & then i be like "what" & then they say "never mind" WTFFF
People push you to your limits and when you finally explode and fight back they think you're the mean one!
The awkward moment when you realize you're wrong in an argument, but you keep arguing anyway.
New condom slogan: Wrap it in latex or she's gonna get your paychecks.
With all the smiles you brought me, I never thought that you could cause me so many tears.
I hate it when teachers say, ”You think its funny?" Obviously. That’s why I laughed, bitch.
I live for two reasons: (1) I was born. (2) I haven't died yet.
I need to start eating more healthy, but first I need to eat all the junk food in my house so it's not there to tempt me anymore.
S.I.N.G.L.E = Strong, Independent, Noticeable, Generous, Loving , Enlightened.
Does a transformer get car insurance or life insurance?
I've learned one important thing about guys. Some will be your best friends, but It takes one special person to change your world.
So easy to love someone, but so hard to make someone love you.
Being single won't give you 100% happiness but it will keep you from the pain.
Remembering an old argument and getting pissed all over again thinking about all the awesome points you should have made. >.<
STOP being a little bitch, and man the fuck up! Seriously, I have heels that are bigger than your dick! (>_<)
"PAPI, SENOR FRIJOLES! :D" - trying to explain to Papi that Mr. BEAN is on! ;P
Feel like tweeting all night.
Overdramatically turning the page on a test so people know you're ahead of them.
Real Girlfriend = Calls u for NOTHING , Texts u all the time, Wants 2 see u, Cries, Get Jealous, Over protective & LOVES YOU...
Childhood = Like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you.
I wonder if Asian people put smileys like this ¦)
Ever have that one person whose presence automaticly pisses you off?
Name your iPod 'Titanic', plug it into the computer, "Titanic is syncing", press cancel, feel like a hero.
Perfect people aren't real, and real people aren't perfect. So you can either love people for their flaws, or hate them because they're real
Fat City Bitch. Fat Fat City Bitch Ten Ten Doughnuts and a Twinkie Bitch. VIP Micky D's No Guest List.
Dear everyone, Hello Kitty isn't a virgin anymore. Sincerely, Garfield
A good neighbor is one that does not put a password on their wi-fi
Mint gum + Cold water = Coolest feeling ever.
Disagreeing with someone just to annoy them.
Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas Gas .. STOP .. Now Make Them Muthafuckin Prices Drop!
Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues
"Shaggy, u Scooby & Velma go downstairs & check the basement; Daphne & I'll go upstairs & check the bedrooms." Well played Fred, well played
Before. b-e-f-o-r-e, not B4. We speak English. Not bingo.
Best kinds of laughter: 1) Laughing so hard that your laugh becomes silent. 2) Feeling a 6 pack coming. 3) Tears coming out of your eyes.
Me: “I’m over my crush” Crush: “hey” Me: “Nevermind””
If I could bring my shower on stage, I would win American Idol.
When people yawn, do deaf people think they're screaming?
So I heard you like water... Good, you already like 70% of me.
Guys remember: When you are sitting there all day playing Call of Duty, your GF is calling some other guy to do your duty.
Friends are like boobs, some are small and some are big, some are real, and some are fake.
I'm not drunk, I'm just trying to walk like jack sparrow.
TWITTER = Typing What I'm Thinking To Everyone Reading.
Once I put on my headphones, my life becomes a music video.
Reason why I hate school: 5% Annoying people. 5% Shitty Teachers. 90% IT'S NOT HOGWARTS!
Sometimes when people push u away, it's because they need u to pull them closer
That one song that brings an instant smile to your face.
❒ Single ❒ Taken ✔ Tweeting
2 Reasons Not to Drink Toilet Water. Number 1 and number 2.
Going to bed with wet hair and waking up looking like Hagrid and Susan Boyle's love child.
I didn’t say you were a slut. I just said that your own bed doesn’t see you very often.
Hey, I'm Dyslexic, and this is number. But here's my maybe, call me crazy.
Mission impossible: not eating a french fry on the way home from the drive thru.
Facebook needs a "Wow that's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard, you should be punched in the throat" button.
Father's day, the most confusing day in the ghetto..
Why would you take a bullet for someone? If you have time to jump in front of it, wouldn't they have time to move?
I'm in shape... round is a shape.
Tripping over something in public, then trying to play it off by randomly starting to skip or jump.
Being the first to clap in an audience & then everybody joins you & thinking "Yeah, you are all my Bitches."
"I got 99 chores & I ain't did one." - Lay Z
Simba was walking too slow, so I told him to Mufasa.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out? ;)
10 year olds have a Blackberry, an iPad, a laptop, and a Facebook... When I was 10, I felt cool with my new markers.
Whoever decided to put Women in the Army... You're brilliant. Woman on her period + Gun= Unstoppable
I've always wanted to get in a taxi and yell, "FOLLOW THAT CAR!!"
I hate when I’m listening to music really loud and I have to keep pausing it because I constantly think I’m hearing my name being called.
Do you like me? Breathe for yes; lick your eyebrow for no.
Admit it, at some point in your life you’ve tried to see if you have superpowers.
The best place to hide a dead body is page 2 of Google search results.
Lazy rule: can't reach it, don't need it.
I'm not fat. I'm just so sexy that it overflows.
I met Eminem once, he was pretty awkward; His palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy, vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti.
Silly phone, that wasn’t a “missed” call. That was a “Looked And Saw Who It Was And Pressed Ignore” call.
I respect whoever allowed women into the military. Girl on period + gun = Unstoppable.
Oh, you think you're ugly? I am sorry, but you spelled attention seeking whore wrong.
Immature: A word used by boring people to describe fun people.
At the speed of light, time stops.
Hey I just met you, and girl you look crazy, what brands your make-up, Crayola maybe?
Your relationship with GOD is more important than any thing because you know for sure that's a relationship that will last forever.
My mirror and my camera have two completely different ideas of what I look like.
You have to accept that not everyone is going to love you back, that's why it's most important to love yourself.
Sometimes, being too nice is dangerous.
Now of days arguing is played out. I'm the type of person that will ignore you and laugh at your air head ass.
If you admire the rainbow after the rain then, why not love again after the pain?
“: sumtimez we waste 2 much time thinking about some1 who doesnt even think about us 4 a second.” 😒
Take advantage of oppurtunities it may be the one to make a difference
"Tweeting" is so much more better than "Updating my Facebook Status" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Sitting at a movie theater & saying "I wanna see that!" to every trailer.
Mirror: Wow, you look nice today!
.. Camera: LOL, No you don't
Being fat = Lowers your chance of getting kidnapped.
Relationships nowadays: 1 week = 1 year. 1 month = a decade.
1+1 = 3 If You dont use a condom!
If I see your facebook in your bio, I'm going to add you ok:-)
There are only two reasons why people can hurt you: 1: You really care about them. 2: They don't really care about you.
"No iPods in school!" Yeah, because I'm gonna cheat off my test by listening to California Girls.
when a girl gives up, its not because she doesnt love u, but because shes tired of getting hurt & feels like u'll never care
I'm the type to stay committed, as long as you can do the same.
Once you're attached, it's difficult to let go.
The worst feeling ever is not knowing whether you should wait or give up.
In life, you're going to be left out, talked about, lied to, and used, but you have to decide who's worth your tears and who's not!
chart music just gets worse and worse with every song that comes out
You're that guy that no matter how many guys I go through, I will always have a thing for.
i hate it when a family member comes up to you and just stares at your screen then you just sit there doing nothing until they go..
In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
My level of immaturity changes depending on who I'm with ;)
Sit back, relax and don’t give a damn what a BITCH thinks.
If someone looks into your eyes for more than 6 seconds without blinking he/she wants to kill you or get laid with you.
No texts no calls, nothing. But I'm still here thinking about you like crazy.
Although, most gestures are learned, babies are born with the ability to smile, since even blind babies can do it.
The best feeling comes when you realize you’re perfectly happy without the people you thought you needed the most.
No Honesty. No Trust. No Nothing.
Females learn to talk earlier, use sentences earlier, and learn to read more quickly than males.
"I promise I won't get mad, just tell me.
Sometimes I keep my feelings to myself because its hard to find someone who understands.
Some mistakes are way too fun to only make ONCE.
thinks every guy that talks to her likes her.
When people take too long to text back, I like to think they are writing a very long, thoughtful text message about how funny and sexy I am.
we don't even know why we're friends with them.
Hey, im a 14 yearold singer, can you check this out? : VIDEO
"Did you do your homework?" "Did you grade my test?" "I have other student's tests to grade." "I have other teacher's homework to do."
I'm excited for the Snooki & Jwow show(:
Dont u hate it when ur trying to keep the conversation alive by talking, then all they say is lol... go jump off a fuckin bridge
Just because one person doesn't know how to treat you right, it doesn't mean that everyone is going to be like that..
I hate losing friends over stupid arguments.
One more stupid love song, I'll be sick.
Water - I aint do'n shit, water you doing?
It's nice spending time with my dad. He has me laughing non-stopp :D. Love himmm <3
Seriously, we should definitely make out.
A morning text doesn't only mean "good morning" It also means "I think about you when I wake up"
Just because I don't talk to you it doesn't mean I still don't think about you. I'm just distancing myself because I know I can't have you.
Nigga fuck you go suck my big hors dick "Nigga You Gay"
That feeling you get when, his name shows up on your phone. ♥
16 & Pregnant = Dumb Girls.
marijuana- i Went to the store & ask if marijuana to go.
Life happens. People change. Feelings change. Relationships end. Memories stay.
I Entered the word "Moron" into my GPS to see what would happen, and guess what? .......... I'm outside your house.
"So how far have you gone with a guy?" "....Well there was this one time..we made eye contact. It was awesome."
Some people want drugs, some people want sex. Honestly, all I want is you.
Women's logic: When you like a guy, do nothing about it and expect him to magically know and make the first move.
"is your tweet about me???" no, but it's should've been
Unfortunately, you can’t just stop your heart from liking someone.
There's a big difference between: Who we love, who we settle for, and who we're meant for.
"I'd like a $5 dollar footlong"....."That'll be 6.05"....."Bitch what??
The son of a bitch moment when you're walking around the house in socks and you step on a wet spot.
If you want people to remember you, do the things worth remembering.
The most beautiful smile is the first real one after tears.
Best gift a guy can give his girlfriend: His time, his attention, and his love.
In relationships, every girl wants three things: eyes that don't cry, lips that don't lie and love that won't die.
I act like I don't care, but deep inside, I swear it hurts.
Mirror: You look cute today. - Camera: LMAO, no.
If I like you ...you will know it...If I don't like you will know that too!
Kids, don't do cocaine, But if you do Make sure you have a lot cause you'll want it.
I can't live without y̶o̶u̶. FOOD.
Live life with someone; not for someone.
"send me a pic." Ummm no.
Life is like camera. Focus on what's important. And you will capture it perfectly.
Just because my eyes don't have tears, doesn't mean my heart doesn't cry.
That moment when you can actually feel the pain in your chest from seeing or hearing something that breaks your heart.
Don’t ever think you’re nothing. Somewhere along the line, there’s someone who truly thinks you’re everything.
The awkward moment when your finally take a decent picture and then as you continue to stare at it, it gets uglier.
I can't live without y̶o̶u̶. OXYGEN!
That awesome moment when you’re telling a lie and your best friend notices and joins you.
I'm not addicted to texting, I'm addicted to the person I'm texting.
In life, you’re going to be left out, talked about, lied to, and used, but you have to decide who’s worth your tears and who’s not.
Enough is never enough, never.