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inkƐd Þгin¢ƐssHell2011-12-06
@alwayzintruble863 days
@kylemoore1980 's Suicide girl Bipolar. Gypsy. Canadian. Tattooed. Pierced. Owned.
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8,9132,27235,44834931,957
We found 197 favorite tweets.
CuntCrusher @CuntyWhiteKnght
[tweet about choking some girl blah blah blah]
13h               
11
2
Shkeeber @shkeeber
Pro tip: Avoid embarrassing tan lines by becoming a hopeless shut-in.
13h               
33
6
KingAmir @kingamir
I'm just gonna slip into something a little more comfortable.

*slips into your mom
13h               
19
5
Toxic Probably @ToxicProbably
This is one of those pretending to work is hard work tweets.
13h               
57
26
Lush @Detriots
But because it was written in a book a long ass time ago people call it gospel.
13h               
5
4
Daniel Plainview @10InchesPlus
You're 40 years old and you need to "sample" chicken? GTFO
14h               
23
4
Brian Hope @Brianhopecomedy
One of my wife's boots ripped so apparently she has to buy another 200 pairs.
17h               
32
12
NoUCantBangMe @MelissaJoy33
A group of deer in my backyard is called dinner.
19h               
26
10
Jennifer @Jennifergr8
Yesterday Jesus came through my door.

Today, this pic.twitter.com/ogPiSCU83Y
19h               
4
1
Kinky Kitty @kjataylor
Easy cum easy go ... Always
19h               
17
4
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
If how someone else manages their twitter account bothers you, might I suggest you turn on the news and get a reality check Xx
20h               
73
18
Alex v 2.1 @Alxhabr
I hate everything.
20h               
2
MiniMe @MiniMeWeeGuy
<------ does all his own stunts and sex scenes.
20h               
8
3
NoUCantBangMe @MelissaJoy33
My favorite tweeters are the ones who have blocked me, but still star my stuff.
20h               
21
6
Drunk N Naughty @drunkNnaughty
This depression diet just isn't working for me, what I need is a good messy breakup.
20h               
39
10
spanky [ham] pants @koalaslament
Who Let The Frogs Out
21h               
18
3
Rainbow Kike @Ginlicker
My asshole is pink n it comes out every night just like the moon
1d               
29
10
Lush @Detriots
LOL Dudes who post selfies are hella gay.

*Posts shirtless body shots all over IG*
1d               
9
3
Chopper @chopper4jk
It’s cute how Kanye West still thinks he’s destined for greatness while the rest of the world thinks he’s a fucking idiot.
1d               
99
30
OG➌ @13_Mario_13
I'd block you in real life too, so....
1d               
14
9
Lush @Detriots
I've shot loads bigger than your intellect.
1d               
10
1
Hickory Dickory @_Shizzle
Just imagine how fucking annoying and fake she is in real life.
1d               
18
5
Psychotic Humor @PHDaniel_Street
It kills me how some of you just RT tweets that an 8 year old could write out
1d               
40
20
The Robfather™ @thatUPSdude
You call it a midlife crisis, I call it finally doing what the fuck I want.
1d               
275
185
Shkeeber @shkeeber
Weight loss tip: Put less stuff in your mouth.
1d               
240
147
Chris Burns @OneFunnyBastard
Luner eclipse? Pfffft. Today I witnessed an anal eclipse when my wife's ass blocked out the sun for 2 hours while she cleaned the windows.
1d               
9
7
MiniMe @MiniMeWeeGuy
I'm just here for the boobies, always the boobies.
1d               
8
2
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
Traffic, much like love.
You'll get there when you get there.
No point having a conniption about it, now is there Xx
1d               
59
12
ShittyShittyGangBang @ShittyComedian
Meanwhile on Facebook Chad just finished a killer workout, Cynthia is making soup, and Jane is feeling blessed for some unknown reason.
2d               
96
49
FUCKYOUSTUPIDFUCKS @_KOALA_HUG_
@Aww_crazy and I'm pretty sure it's @alwayzintruble's tweet. I just RTed it yesterday. if you can't be yourself, slit your wrist! Cunt
2d in reply to Aww_crazy               
2
snowjob @canadasandra
*watches porn* *learns how women pee* *learns that men like to watch women pee*
2d               
61
16
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
I don't like reading sweeping generalisations, makes me sad anyone can be that closed minded. Which is pretty closed minded of me innit Xx
2d               
51
2
Brewsandboobs @Brewsandboobs
Payday happen today, sold the business your looking at a millionaire!!!
4d               
6
Darlene @SarcasticWonder
@alwayzintruble Oh you do!
4d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
Smug Overdose @IngestMyBabies
I never deviate from sexual deviants.
4d               
12
2
Bombs @TheB0MBS
I can touch my toes without bending my knees and lick my balls concurrently.
4d               
5
1
KingAmir @kingamir
Music and Arts festival or Outdoor Homeless Shelter?
4d               
10
CuntCrusher @CuntyWhiteKnght
I am rough but gentle.
4d               
15
2
Lush @Detriots
The person above this tweet likes to eat smegma.
4d               
12
6
Nerf Herder @TrueTorontoGirl
Like my mom used to say, keep laughing and I’ll smack you again.
4d               
50
10
FUCKYOUSTUPIDFUCKS @_KOALA_HUG_
Just checking in to let you guys know I'm still alive and pretty.
4d               
37
16
Drunk N Naughty @drunkNnaughty
I would rather you not love me to death.
4d               
132
59
st00pidcide @st00pidfast
Go home, @alwayzintruble, you're drunk.
4d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
st00pidcide @st00pidfast
OH MAN YOUR BRO TWEETS NEVER GET OLD, JASON
4d in reply to st00pidfast               
3
1
Sly @slyoung5
My mind is like Pig Pen. Forever dirty.
4d               
117
37
st00pidcide @st00pidfast
You have a beautiful penis, you should untuck it bro.
4d               
7
RogueBastard @RogueGod
Things return to me that still seem real.
5d               
63
16
Enraged Asshole @maulingmueller
Can we just make all detrimental things legal so that all the idiots can start dying off? Fuck.
5d               
10
7
The Weeping Prophet @GaelicMohawk
Last one
@lovebykilowatts
@Guido_Burrito
@dukenewk
@rickinhisflesh
@RealDMK
@alwayzintruble
@TCGoar
@fillthevacuum
@mynameisellep
5d               
4
2
Ian @imac76
@alwayzintruble I had no doubt
5d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
Bombs @TheB0MBS
@alwayzintruble I'm calling Canadian CPS as we speak
5d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
wheelz @anybodywheela
@alwayzintruble Just tell your 12 year old that the answer to that question is tricky tricky tricky tricky.
5d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
I am CanadianCyn @CanadianCyn
Big shoutout to people who feel the need to shout

"I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU SINCE REHAB!"

across a busy street.

Now I need a drink.
5d               
152
55
Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss
I wish birds were a little less chirpy and a little more shutty uppy.
5d               
159
53
Budgie Bigelow @Buzzquotes
If I found a genie in a bottle you'd die three times.
5d               
7
2
Torie @torieannesalt
My tweets make sense if you're drunk enough
5d               
122
53
Jennifer @Jennifergr8
Sure windows. Configure now. IT'S NOT LIKE IM IN A FUCKING RUSH OR ANYTHING. Ball bag.
5d               
6
Hollie McVicars @holliemcvicars
my mom is sending me pictures of her wedding dress from her room, she's so excited #adorable.
6d               
1
∞Ќ№tħ℮ad∞ @_Knothead_
@alwayzintruble #myrtlebeach !! Yay!
6d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
lil dick tornado @RatBatallion
"This is my song." - Me anytime I hear a woman crying
6d               
19
7
Oh, THAT Duchess... @THEDUTHCHESS
Day 1 of being kidnapped.

Kidnappers are now offering my husband a ransom to take me back.

Husband is asking for more money.
6d               
231
161
Oh, THAT Duchess... @THEDUTHCHESS
Your pictures aren't loading on my TL and I've never been happier.
6d               
35
14
TaintUrBalls @TaintUrBalls
Sometimes some death metal just soothes my soul...
8d               
17
5
IG @samalmightysam
Ironically, the emptier your heart, the heavier it feels.
8d               
220
150
Top A. Hole @AFSMGNM
I'm done starring everyone's selfies.
From now on, they all get the same @ reply.

"Mom?"

#topahole
8d               
6
2
Sue Permarket @Hormonella
I don't always manhandle the baked goods but, when I do, I pinch a loaf.
8d               
88
13
RogueBastard @RogueGod
Bad jokes and even worse puns are still better than reading your bullshit drama.
8d               
79
19
Justin? @JustMerc
Losing followers because I haven't been tweeting much. Pfft. Get the hell outta here!
8d               
13
3
The Robfather™ @thatUPSdude
She looked in my direction, she wants me.

~Men
8d               
178
99
RogueBastard @RogueGod
The first and best rule is mind your own fucking business.
8d               
137
77
RogueBastard @RogueGod
I love watching greedy people on game shows walk away with nothing. Ungrateful cunts.
8d               
69
11
RogueBastard @RogueGod
Do the voices ever stop?
8d               
86
25
Rainbow Kike @Ginlicker
I celebrated 30 days of sobriety with a 13 year gin binge
8d               
34
13
Shōgun of Twîtter @shwebby3
Booze

Also known as Dumb Dumb Juice
8d               
74
18
Rainbow Brite @Cool_Jesse
Explain to this doughnut why I should let you show me your lady-parts.
8d               
4
UCMEICU2 @ExploringUrMind
My favorite extreme sport is tweeting with so little effort. And you just magically appear.
9d               
15
1
Mattchew @mattchew81
A trophy but for bitch of the day
9d               
10
1
miss charades @ShockTartBionic
Sorry I punched you in the face after tasting your pancakes but how do you fuck up something so easy
9d               
36
14
HeWhoCanNotBeNamed @Machine_ov_Hate
loneliness can be cured with a bottle of pills or a razor blade kiss
9d               
7
P Silva @PSilvaWorld
Let me ask you one thing though, bitch did I ask you?
9d               
4
3
MMMMMMark @Eightinchgoat
A tattoo of a labyrinth on my nut sack would be totes amazeballs.
9d               
61
27
bearded grumblings @liberalcannon
My sex video is me falling off my computer chair trying to jerk off.
9d               
57
17
Johnny Derp @realitybud
Anyone offers you a way to relieve your tortured, aching soul, and it's heroin, stab them. Stab them dead. Don't hesitate, it's you or them.
9d               
14
6
That Mothafucka @Sal0630
Nobody loves reggae music more than white people on vacation.
9d               
374
223
J's_Soul @thunderinmysoul
And I still and always notice things that should've stayed unnoticed...like a cruel trick my mind plays on my heart to never let it rest...
9d               
19
3
Travis LeBlanc @TravLeBlanc
Don't make me get epic. You wouldn't like when I'm epic. Everyone else would love it but you would hate it.
9d               
292
136
Super Dad @superdadatron
Hey followers that unfollow shortly after I follow back...remember that "the field mouse is fast but the owl sees at night. Muahaha!"
9d               
160
66
WikiPETEdia @NOPeteHere
Why are Oakley Sunglasses trending?

Did a bus full of douchebags crash leaving a Nickelback show?
9d               
9
4
Black Jesus @reerectedbgs
My side chick said if this tweet gets 100 RT I can name my son Honkey Cracker Williams
9d               
8
6
rain chick™ @allforandrea
I try not to let my mind run wild, but when it does, it's always chasing you.
9d               
191
128
Martin Munson @wickedimproper
There should be a dating site just for people with IBS called eCharminy.
9d               
3
Hollie McVicars @holliemcvicars
i want a milkshake or a sundae or a mcflurry or a frostie or a blizzard (or all of the above).
9d               
10
4
King Cray-Cray™ @DropsNoPanties
Your actions speak so loudly I can no longer hear what you are saying
9d               
106
98
J's_Soul @thunderinmysoul
People who get retweeted but do not retweet are the kind of people that only know how to get love but never give. And we know how that ends.
9d               
22
10
El Knuckelhombre @ElKnuckelhombre
Daddy, why is the sky blue?

Sweetie, I don't even know why my pajama pants have pockets okay? It's just science. Now go to bed.
10d               
138
59
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
Whiny is my kryptonite.
Unless it's me whining then I'm totes ok with it and everyone should just give me what I want so i'll stop Xx
10d               
59
6
BlotterMonkey @BlotterMonkey
Suggestion: kill all who would put the needle in the haystack .. I mean who does that anyway?
10d               
5
Brian Hope @Brianhopecomedy
Every time I close my eyes for a second my kids start screaming which gives me a headache at home but is refreshing in the car.
10d               
31
7
Dr Frank N' Furter @1InTheStinker
I'd fuck your mouth like it was your asshole
10d               
27
8
Joel Danger @joeldanger
How do you say "I don't care" in every language?
10d               
419
298
RogueBastard @RogueGod
I'm 2 months shy of 40, yet I act and live like I'm 21. IDGAF.
10d               
88
14
Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss
Sorry I can't relate to your tweets about having feelings, friends or a life.
11d               
120
36
Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss
I really need to get some friends. I'm tired of spending Saturday nights making all the bad decisions by myself.
11d               
81
17
Cody Wilson @codemandriller
Did you see the size of that condom in the back pocket of that Cowboy? So that's why city girls are so scared of them.
11d               
9
8
Toxic Probably @ToxicProbably
I just dieted for two hours. Fuck diets.
11d               
327
164
Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss
It's been so long since I've gotten laid that I actually wish I could refuck all the people I had once wished to unfuck.
11d               
145
47
קคยl кєєภє™ @ThePaulKeene
I'd love to see women not wear make up for a whole week. The ones that took the selfies on facebook used filters to hide everything..
11d               
4
Js_Dark_Reality @Js_Dark_Reality
My mind sure has a way of telling me things my heart never wants to believe.
11d               
95
46
Chewstroke @chewstroke
im always right. its kinda neat.
12d               
19
5
Jess [ham] @thejessbess
thigh gap lol more like thigh gayyyyyyy
13d               
30
9
Juddy @iAmJuddy
God I love smoking lounges at the airport. And fucking beer me!
13d               
77
16
Benn Tornado_Hobo @Ilovelamp1979
.Every joke has been told.

You can all go the fuck home now.
13d               
68
22
CuntCrusher @CuntyWhiteKnght
It's not over, I have more dirty things to tell you. I'll wait for you to go into your meeting though.
13d               
14
2
CuntCrusher @CuntyWhiteKnght
@alwayzintruble ❤️
13d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
Arrogant Twat @Arrogant_Twat
@alwayzintruble Damn. Then your neighbour is FINE! 😜
13d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
Mr Behaving @ImBehaving
I use the term eat my ass way to often, I hope someone gets the hint
13d               
5
2
Mrs.Throbinson @mellimelle
Fight for what you believe in,
before there's nothing left to fight for.
13d               
52
37
Arrogant Twat @Arrogant_Twat
I just got unlimited North American calling. I’m going to call each an every one of you now.
13d               
37
7
notyourjester @Loli_Sug
IM A DUDE WITH A BIG CURVY THROBBING COCK LEAVE ME ALONE
13d               
22
3
Danny Charnley @DanKCharnley
i have been called many things: smart, handsome, friendly, compulsive liar
13d               
77
17
Your favorite psycho @SgtBlueEyes
RT if you're not really reading this
13d               
6
2
Vanilla Cupcake @Vanilla_cupcak
I goto walmart grocery shopping when Im hungry so I don't buy too much stuff...I lose my appetite when I see the sweatpant wiener outlines
13d               
22
6
notyourjester @Loli_Sug
I refuse to date men who drink Mt Dew
13d               
28
4
The Reverend @ReverendEBW
I shaved my nipples for this?
13d               
6
5
Amanda Reckonwith @click4amanda
if you DEMAND to be treated like a lady, you better actually be one
13d               
4
1
Sarah Secord @SarahSecord
Sometimes I still dream about Duck Hunt.
13d               
12
1
Tammy @tamytoo2
I'm starting to feel offended by FB's need for me to lose belly fat.
13d               
14
2
Beth @SolelyB
Son: All I said was "I like your new hair cut", now shes mad at me.
Me: You mean the hair cut AND new color she got LAST week?

Son: Oh shit
13d               
63
20
StarkCity @StarkCity
I blame coffee...... And the fact that these fools are fucking stupid.
13d               
6
The Whiskey Zombie @Inkdhawaiian
*tries to act cool by not replying to a text right away and ends up forgetting to reply at all*
13d               
1
Pony Starwars @tigersgoroooar
Nothing says, "I've given up on adulthood, my body and life" like ordering a cookie dough flavored iced coffee. Like I just did.
13d               
83
14
8====D~~( . Y . ) @EYEH8EYE
Its not the face your fucking....
Its the fuck your facing..
So if you turn it down..
Turn it face down..
13d               
1
@Poop_Dragon
I imagine whoever said "if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all" had few friend and was probably an asshole.
13d               
9
8
Monica @LittleHarmonica
I've done a lot of fucked up things in my time but at least I never had an eyebrow piercing.
13d               
41
6
notyourjester @Loli_Sug
Coworker: I feel like my BF is holding me down & smothering me

Me: Mmmm I love that, & when they spit in your face and bury their...oh.
13d               
20
8
Sweet Cheeks @supertweetjen
My life's not all cupcakes and rainbows, but I sure as hell don't take it out on others.
13d               
91
33
Colt 45 & 2 Zigzags @JeremyKCMO
I don't know what to do when an anon account with zero pics, stars my selfies.
13d               
8
1
Alcoholic Keverage @adult_keverage
I just googled "sapiosexual" and yeah, I'm that too.

As long as you're smokin' hot.
13d               
49
18
Wickedwordslinger @StephenBCramer
I discovered I couldn't live with myself, so I moved.
13d               
19
8
Jeff Dwoskin @bigmacher
The only thing better than bagel day at work is forgetting that it's bagel day & then getting to work & remembering it's bagel day.
13d               
30
14
Ginger-At-Law @GingerAtLaw
I'd rather see your music collection than your tits.

When we are done with that, you should take your top off though.
13d               
286
132
NoUCantBangMe @MelissaJoy33
OH MY GOD! WHY IS THIS TAKING SO LONG?

~Me, about 3 minutes into doing something I don't want to do.
13d               
81
39
William_Shartner @Blarebare
If you agree that Hollywood should make a movie about homeless fighter pilots called Bums Away, please press '4' now.
13d               
15
2
Guy Dangerous @Lerky
By all means keep filming that crying African baby for our sake. Whatever you do, don't pick it up or feed it or anything humane.
13d               
106
59
StarkCity @StarkCity
Oh twitter you sneaky fuck....... Saying the update was about improving picture posts then tossing in a whole bunch of shit in my TL. Whore
13d               
5
1
Rob Rubin @ForeverHairy
I'm sorry, not sorry for your loss.
13d               
6
CrankyPappy @CrankyPappy
We're all here, alone together.
13d               
35
28
Neil @youngestneil
My greatest regret is not standing up for others when they can't stand up for themselves.
13d               
18
4
Token Geezer @Token_Geezer
War!

Huh!

What is it good for?

Winning elections, control of oil, weapons dealers, rebuilding contractors, the dollar..

Say it again!
14d               
166
73
Fixated @TheSnideOne
Remember kids, when adults say weed is a gateway drug, they mean a gateway to happiness.
14d               
53
27
Rachie @rachiecandice
I’m Aussie.

I can’t help being cooler than you. I was born this way.
14d               
24
2
PieGuy @ilovepie84
When life hands you lemons, freeze them and throw them at old people
14d               
43
18
Joab Pudindinker @JoabPudindinker
At my age, I hide my own Easter eggs.

Did I tweet this last year?

What?

Last week? Really?
14d               
9
2
Daniel Plainview @10InchesPlus
There's never 'too much weed' there are only acceptable levels of weed shortages.
14d               
33
15
Whatevers Clever @wittybigtwittys
Nice group avi are you the fat one?
14d               
44
22
Mary Charlene @IamEnidColeslaw
sorry I bit your tongue when you tried to kiss me
14d               
259
87
Joab Pudindinker @JoabPudindinker
Orgasms are just like regular gasms but with a choice.
14d               
10
2
~Cindy~ @CindyMeakin
We all seek the same things. Love, happiness, idiots not talking to us ...
14d               
62
41
Donkey punch yo mom✯ @ryan5551
It's just one of those days were beer is the answer to everything.
14d               
21
7
Donkey punch yo mom✯ @ryan5551
Alright brain I don't like you an you don't like me so let's do this. .an drink some damn beer so I can shut you up.
14d               
16
3
☠Êv¡£☠Genius☠ @That_Damn_Duck
Some of you really need to worry less about how someone uses their twitter account and worry more about why it bothers you so damn much.
14d               
458
306
Rachie @rachiecandice
I’ve decided to see a psychiatrist. By making that decision I know I’m too sane to need a psychiatrist.
I should probably just stay home.
14d               
19
3
Miss Moneypenny @_Ms_Moneypenny_
I'm sorry I cancelled our date tonight but a friend sent me a link called Indifferent Cats in Porn and it looks like I'll be busy until May.
14d               
79
23
Kaz Tastrophe @kaz474
I could use a little more giveth and a little less taketh away.
14d               
27
7
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
Social media is only dangerous if you play with catfish or are a lying fucknugget.
Don't like someone?
BLOCK THEM, silly bean.
14d               
81
19
Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss
Some lady just told me we're only on this planet for a limited amount of time and all I kept thinking was 'thank fuck for that.'
14d               
139
59
Kyle Moore @kylemoore1980
@alwayzintruble has inspired me to drop my anchor and find my port pic.twitter.com/FgCed0jrLI
14d in reply to alwayzintruble               
4
1
~Cindy~ @CindyMeakin
I don't know about you fuckers, but I'm looking forward to feeling the suns heat on my body. I might orgasm instantly ...

To be cont. . .
14d               
59
13
Rizz @InnocentMarina6
Loud breathers?
Nope, there's a pillow for that
14d               
20
11
Colt 45 & 2 Zigzags @JeremyKCMO
I'm "looking up exes on Facebook" depressed.
14d               
111
50
C-U-R-T @FrankCurtisB
Maybe you wouldn't be so fat if you got a life outside the internet.
14d               
12
2
CrankyPappy @CrankyPappy
You're never beaten until you think you are.
But I always think I am.
14d               
16
5
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
He's been here since the dawn of time and been one of my favourites ever since @Cool_Jesse.
You might like his brand of fun Xx
14d               
12
Budgie Bigelow @Buzzquotes
I've touched myself more than once today.
14d               
8
2
MiniMe @MiniMeWeeGuy
My superpower is making trumpet noises from my butt.
14d               
5
1
Clark Can't @iheartgunts
"This too, shall pass."--kidney stones.
14d               
49
15
J's_Soul @thunderinmysoul
What a selfish way to "love" if loving is all about getting...
14d               
26
16
Brian Hope @Brianhopecomedy
"Hey look - dolphins!"

"No Bob, those are 'suspicious objects'. Now go tell the media."
14d               
28
8
iblamethemonkey @iblamethemonkey
In your case your Twitter addiction is beneficial to your kids as you don’t have time to fuck them up.

Keep on tweeting, dear.
14d               
8
1
walter harrison @wdharry
I need some fucken INK.
14d               
1
Rainbow Brite @Cool_Jesse
I'm fuckin' magical.
14d               
13
7
Rainbow Brite @Cool_Jesse
Everyone has a crush on me.
14d               
26
15
Mr Behaving @ImBehaving
On FB, my in a relationship status is with Twitter
15d               
5
2
Sue Permarket @Hormonella
Got a call today for more pictures of my breasts.

OK, it was from those mammogram jerks.

STILL!
15d               
117
27
Js_Dark_Reality @Js_Dark_Reality
I'm so used to shit moving in the other direction, I don't know what I'd do if something actually worked the way I wanted it to.
15d               
56
18
Kristy @live_free_4ever
You horny people crack me up!

But I get it, I totally get it...
15d               
22
7
Lady Sly Madness @BriarSlyMadness
Mirror mirror on the wall...

...FUCK YOU.
15d               
140
93
Jarhead @Jarhead44
Damn right, I'd do CPR mouth to mouth on a guy. But only a hot guy.
15d               
212
109
Joel Danger @joeldanger
"You should definitely sweat the small stuff"

- guys with small penises, probably
15d               
25
9
Jarhead @Jarhead44
You're gonna follow me based on only 1 of my tweets you read? And a clean one? Good luck to you.
15d               
165
76
KWB @KittyWittyBang
My body has a first name, it's "go the fuck away"
15d               
21
2
Js_Dark_Reality @Js_Dark_Reality
I'm pretty sure we didn't meet, for just nothing.
15d               
96
58
Lord Fuckface @BORNofCHAOS
Well if the shoe fits fucken stalker, put it on.
15d               
6
1
Spanky McDutcherson @thatdutchperson
"for April fools we should all switch Avis and names and tweet as each other!"

'Should we invite @thatdutchperson?'

"Who?"

-Twitter Elite
15d               
12
1
Mrs.Throbinson @mellimelle
My kids are driving me nuts. I could really use a change of screamery.
15d               
41
14
Tink, The Duchess @Tinkerbell_
There will be people who attack you for no reason other than that they hate their lives.
Be thankful you're not them.
And keep on living Xx
15d               
122
50
Darlene @SarcasticWonder
@alwayzintruble just drive around in a loud lifted truck or motorcycle. Pretty much the same thing
15d in reply to alwayzintruble               
1
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