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Last 100 tweetsCheck out the last 100 tweets of the user, with videos and, thumbnails of the pictures, and expanded url's embedded in the tweet.
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ImageNameLocationTwitter sinceLinks
Matt Fusfeld2008-08-13
@mattfusfeld2,076 days
I work hard to stay this fat.
FollowersFollowingTweetsListsFavorites
2,520457477893,013
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Just met a guy at a coffee shop in Playa Del Rey who's also a screenwriter!! Small world LOL!!
6d               
8
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Al Bundy worked in ladies shoes and he haaaaaaated it.
12d               
2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Does anybody know how to buy wine at Ralphs?
15d               
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I think it's fair to say Gloria Estefan has helped more Cuban-Americans come out of the closet than any other one singer.
27d               
5
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
They say print is dead but I still love peeking at newsstand porno mags.
32d               
2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Watching sober adults having fun bowling? Don't care for it.
36d               
8
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Lotta upbeat shit happening at the airport bar.
36d               
8
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Yeah, everybody likes when it stays lighter out later, we don't need to make small talk about it.
41d               
9
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Y'know, I'll go the other way: I kinda like fluorescent lights.
43d               
2
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Girls who call baby boys "flirts" are the worst.
51d               
11
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Gerald McRaney has been in his 60s for most of his life.
51d               
8
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Why the fuck is Starz emailing me?
52d               
5
John Quaintance @John_Quaintance
They say Abercrombie & Fitch is dying but their flagship LA store always has at least half a dozen Asian tourists in their forties in it.
52d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Luv my girl @F1abraham “All IS WELL :) so happy for what I've learned, the mom I've become and the family and friends in my life”
53d in reply to F1abraham               
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Aren't all dry cleaners green at this point?
53d               
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I was one of those teens who looked goooood in braces.
53d               
6
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I feel like me and Gaby Hoffman have aged similarly.
54d               
7
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Is 26 the cut-off for enlisting in the military or for applying to be on the Real World?
54d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
We'll never be a civilized society until there's a blind copy option on texting.
58d               
5
1
Robert Zoref @deskjob
Say what you will about their politics, but the Nazis had great hair.
67d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
How much do you have to love the acoustic guitar to have one in your office at work
65d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
How can I trust anything Kurt Russell says when he lied to Goldie Hawn after she fell off her yacht and got amnesia?
76d               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
The Cool Runnings soundtrack is alive and well over supermarket speakers everywhere.
80d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
"Matthew McConekey was fabulous in the Dallas Cowboy." #motherinlaw
91d               
6
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Oh no, me and Lena Dunham have the same tits. Awkward!
93d               
9
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Getting excited to make Coachella plans I won't follow through on.
101d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Lotta UPS guys still into wearing those livestrong bands.
102d               
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Joseph Gordon-Levitt's been real quiet lately. I bet he's got something big up his sleeve.
103d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
If headshots in restaurants are any indication, Steven Tyler has been to every restaurant in the world.
107d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I wish I was as excited about seeing Courtney Stodden naked as she wants me to be.
107d               
7
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Nobody's more concerned about their taxi driver's mood than me.
108d               
9
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I feel like I used to have fun like the Jackass friends but not anymore and that makes me sad.
110d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
A good joke construction is to ask someone who's quiet, "how come you're so chatty?" Always funny.
110d               
10
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Don't bother with an alarm company. Having the post office hold your mail while you're away is the only way to avoid a break-in.
111d               
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Everybody those law and order cops interview is in an awful rush.
111d               
7
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Really good year for celebrity deaths!
112d               
9
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
So the deal with getting older is I'm never gonna look like I got a good night's sleep again?
113d               
10
2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
My father-in-law has the Zagat Guide in case anybody's looking for a restaurant in New York.
115d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
My mother-in-law loved that last Coen Brothers' movie, Fargo.
116d               
7
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I don't imagine the Books section of Entertainment Weekly gets a lot of eyes.
118d               
7
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
How much do you have to love Dr. Pepper to wear that t-shirt.
123d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Leave the newspaper on the driveway long enough for your neighbors to see you get it but not too long that they realize you don't read it.
126d               
5
2
steve basilone @sbasilone
Its easy to be cynical, but seeing @realmikefox and Chris Lloyd do a scene is a good reminder that life is pretty ok pic.twitter.com/GWuEk8IpjF
149d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I'd say a garage sale is probably the best place to get a shower chair.
162d               
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Huey Lewis really seemed to love cocaine.
170d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Getting worried I may never acquire a taste for chai tea.
176d               
7
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I don't think my life insurance salesman wants it bad enough.
221d               
4
Adam Countee @adamcountee
.@mattfusfeld this is a little awkward...but will you please return my father's bathing suit?
222d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Do yourself a favor and read this short story by an excellent writer I enjoy, Harris Danow: lenadunhamsdick.com
223d               
2
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
The security guard at the supermarket really does it all.
225d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Does Arsenio not know how bad he looks in hats?
229d               
2
Jeffrey Hadz @Hadzilla
2 more months until wyclef comes home!!!!!
231d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
A mailman can only relax when he's eating lunch in his truck.
231d               
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
The confirmation-that-you've-unsubscribed-from-this-email-list email is my least favorite email.
232d               
5
2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
"Yes dad, we know you're friends with Jack White. God." -Conan's kids probably
234d               
3
Artie Johann @DearAnyone
I think it's nice that we let each other wear the same jeans every day.
238d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Nothing gets me in the mood to laugh like the theme song to MASH.
239d               
10
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Getting real excited for google's next April Fool's prank.
241d               
11
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Hearing a little bit more about Benedict Cumberbatch than I'd like.
241d               
8
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I'll probably go my whole life without ever drinking a POM.
244d               
7
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Patch Adams is on, so, looks like I'm spending the rest of the afternoon smiling!
244d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Haven't seen a guy with a black eye in a long time.
245d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Pretty sure if I was a woman I'd end up marrying a handicap guy.
251d               
4
John Quaintance @John_Quaintance
You can tell exactly how old a guy is by how much random stretching he does in public.
253d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
If you're looking for the guys who know everything about everything they're sitting outside Peet's from now until the rest of time.
255d               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Who's got my extra to Danny Devito and Judd Hirsch in The Sunshine Boys at the Ahmanson? Willing to pay face.
256d               
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
How's that guy Boston Rob doing?
257d               
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
@sbasilone Jesus that's beautiful. Write a novel.
260d in reply to sbasilone               
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
"I'm getting really into rum" is a thing people say.
261d               
8
3
Juliet Seniff @julietboner
REALLY chuckling hard over McD's "berry exotic" smoothie campaign!
266d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
1
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Going through a big pretending-I'm-into Tom Waits phase.
270d               
11
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Damn, Al Sharpton looks good. Keepin' it tight.
274d               
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Girls who take nude selfies always have the Samsung galaxy or lesser equivalent.
277d               
11
2
Ed Lee @smedlee
If Orange is the New Black, then look out, orange people buying Skittles in Florida.
280d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
18
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
All food is comfort food to me.
284d               
7
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Is it safe to admit I hated Napoleon Dynamite yet?
285d               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
It's crazy how many guys don't run their hands under water for a second after pissing.
292d               
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9
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
It's never been a more exciting time for sunscreen innovation.
293d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
According to facebook, 1000% of the people I know are in improv groups.
293d               
6
Patrick Stewart @SirPatStew
Lord I love Wimbledon. @laurarobson5 pic.twitter.com/C56suNeYx4
293d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I wonder if the local news has any advice on how to stay safe in this heat wave.
296d               
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3
Ike Barinholtz @ikebarinholtz
On my last anniversary my wife and I went to a fancy restaurant in Los Angeles to celebrate. While we were (cont) tl.gd/n_1rl0da7
300d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Boy my AA group must think I'm some kind of alcoholic.
300d               
3
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Mariska Hargitay has the kind of barrel chest guys spend years in the gym trying to get.
302d               
7
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
The first of my Golden Girls themed wines will be the perfect-for-summer Rosé Nylund.
306d               
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2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
One of the fun parts of making new friends is telling the story of where you were on 9/11.
310d               
14
2
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
The Tonys are just like the Oscars if the Oscars gave awards to movies that cost $200 a ticket to see and played once a day in one city.
313d               
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1
Pop Secret @PopSecret
Moms, lure your teen kids out of their room by popping a bag of @PopSecret Movie Theater Butter. If that still doesn’t work, text them.
331d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Hey Local News Weathercasters: the people who are still getting their weather from you need you to slow down.
330d               
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1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
It's always best to just answer "yeah, it was great," if somebody asks if you've seen an old movie.
330d               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Guys who are super into car audio always listen to the worst music.
335d               
6
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Does anybody know how to tip anybody?
336d               
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Summer's almost here, which means its time to listen to Sugar Ray.
338d               
9
5
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Man are we all gonna be sad when Tom Hanks dies.
339d               
9
2
Spencer Porter @porters
You spend your whole life wondering what's up with that weird guy killing time in his parked car, and then suddenly, that weird guy is you.
339d Retweeted by mattfusfeld               
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Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
To all aspiring screenwriters: women's too short t-shirts on men -- always funny.
339d               
4
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Not to be racist, but I really prefer my bartenders at sporting events to be not white.
340d               
6
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Y'know what, if this cab driver wants to talk, let him make the first move.
343d               
11
1
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
Heather Graham should've won an Oscar for acting like she wanted to fuck Jon Favreau in Swingers.
346d               
16
Matt Fusfeld @mattfusfeld
I always say, "It's the devil you know." I don't know what the second half of that saying is.
346d               
2
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