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@
ImageNameLocationTwitter sinceLinks
The Onion2008-03-04
@TheOnion2,394 days
America's Finest News Source. Subscribe on YouTube: http://t.co/5h833w1KO1
FollowersFollowingTweetsListsFavorites
6,247,6721331,46572,1451
The Onion @TheOnion
U.S. Still Enjoying Small But Loyal Following onion.com/1r1Dvuk
20m               
35
48
The Onion @TheOnion
Police Satisfied After Drunk Man Assures Them There’s No Problem onion.com/1v13P6P pic.twitter.com/bOS49qtTjI
1h               
649
668
The Onion @TheOnion
TIP: Don’t forget about that $535 your parents have saved for your education onion.com/1C6A2gn pic.twitter.com/DYq8kxOOZM
1h               
239
274
ClickHole @ClickHole
Here are a few completely ridiculous historical stories that aren’t actually true clickhole.com/r/1052tsd pic.twitter.com/MEILMEghjH
2h Retweeted by TheOnion               
94
131
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] 400,000 Protesters Turn Out For People’s Climate March In NYC onion.com/1wH3h6x #WhatDoYouThink?
3h               
69
58
Onion Labs @OnionLabs
On #ToughSeason, @WesWelker and @ajgreen_18 have to sit through player orientation onion.com/ZD7U6t pic.twitter.com/4SjzyuwTzN
3h Retweeted by TheOnion               
24
17
The Onion @TheOnion
Mars Maven Begins Mission To Take Thousands Of High-Resolution Desktop Backgrounds onion.com/1uedolc pic.twitter.com/xWNkSWrVzY
4h               
363
376
The Onion @TheOnion
"We live in a dangerous world." – @BarackObama onion.com/1rs25nb pic.twitter.com/krVVLTHviT
4h               
430
463
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: Leaf-Hunting Season Begins onion.com/ZCVonJ pic.twitter.com/tPdqreIwsi
4h               
398
458
The Onion @TheOnion
Man Has Pretty Good Idea Which Friend Going To Give Up On Dream First onion.com/1ue2QlS pic.twitter.com/gqPe69HGdJ
5h               
180
130
The Onion @TheOnion
POLL: Will You Go On The Male Birth Control Pill When It Becomes Available? onion.com/1uSTD1j pic.twitter.com/IJBuz8iZCk
5h               
118
128
The Onion @TheOnion
7.1 Billion Demonstrate In Favor Of Global Warming onion.com/1rrUCVg pic.twitter.com/QZNL9OaWcG
6h               
411
482
Onion Sports Network @OnionSports
NFL Week Three Winners And Losers onion.com/1B223Dg pic.twitter.com/eXkYgUigFF
6h Retweeted by TheOnion               
27
32
ClickHole @ClickHole
6 Billionaires And Their Fucking Sons clickhole.com/r/1029tsd pic.twitter.com/daMZx3QxeK
7h Retweeted by TheOnion               
263
236
The Onion @TheOnion
U.S. Still Enjoying Small But Loyal Following onion.com/1uSMIF8 pic.twitter.com/i46BPhNniA
6h               
264
175
The Onion @TheOnion
Editorial Cartoon: 'All Things Embittered' onion.com/Zap2AT pic.twitter.com/Ef9ZiIpmp1
7h               
76
75
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Ode to Marshall and Lily: The true central couple of How I Met Your Mother avc.lu/1B1F2Al pic.twitter.com/x2hhM7w7UC
10h Retweeted by TheOnion               
344
175
The Onion @TheOnion
A side-by-side comparison of the iPhone 6 Plus and the Samsung Galaxy S5 onion.com/1mCopKB pic.twitter.com/uXKykUCBve
7h               
447
624
The Onion @TheOnion
Police Satisfied After Drunk Man Assures Them There’s No Problem onion.com/XXgpIs pic.twitter.com/Hy0ZqLiZ0W
7h               
1,063
934
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Poll: 90% Of Americans Say Domestic Abuse Revelations Haven’t Changed How Much Football They Watch onion.com/1DsXwOk
8h               
46
53
ClickHole @ClickHole
Can You Complete The Classic Movie Quote? clickhole.com/r/952tsd pic.twitter.com/OQTXSnn2lJ
8h Retweeted by TheOnion               
65
72
The Onion @TheOnion
TIP: Cut costs in half by splitting your education with a buddy onion.com/ZCn4Js pic.twitter.com/cJCME5EPtH
8h               
230
278
The Onion @TheOnion
The Week In Pictures – Week Of September 22, 2014 onion.com/1B1QWKO pic.twitter.com/PNIrvLK6IB
8h               
81
57
The Onion @TheOnion
Rescue Dog Adopted For Couple Weeks onion.com/XMXU9c pic.twitter.com/HVRk6EmA0r
9h               
90
60
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Report: Women Getting ‘Boot Bulge’ Liposuction To Fit Into Fall Boots onion.com/Z9Hc5y #WhatDoYouThink?
9h               
63
43
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: Something Wrong With Literally Everything In Apartment onion.com/1uSi7Yp pic.twitter.com/pVxQcZ8PGA
10h               
234
143
The Onion @TheOnion
On average, schools spend $300 annually on the vintage crackling sound for PA systems onion.com/1p8kwZr pic.twitter.com/x0aphSkZZN
1d               
364
276
The Onion @TheOnion
Highly Touted Terrorist Prospect Weighing Multiple Recruitment Offers onion.com/XGfuvz pic.twitter.com/aKAE9ZVYgI
1d               
285
311
The Onion @TheOnion
Fantasy Team’s Performance Only Thing Man Holding Himself Accountable For onion.com/1wVGRBt
1d               
87
89
The Onion @TheOnion
Report: Laura’s Divorce Threatens Razor-Thin Democratic Majority In Family onion.com/1obo0dv
1d               
79
35
The Onion @TheOnion
EMERGENCY ALERT: Americans in 14 cities advised to avoid downtown areas, nightclubs, football stadiums onion.com/1mo2DKm
1d               
109
121
The Onion @TheOnion
11 AMAZING Photos Of Doug Bramowski As He Slowly Realizes His Wife Is Having An Affair onion.com/1ub3noG pic.twitter.com/P4FjVV723o
1d               
150
100
The Onion @TheOnion
This Week's Top Video: Office Shooting Could Not Have Come At Worse Time For Company onion.com/1DquW05 pic.twitter.com/Vz3gKkKnCM
1d               
270
207
The Onion @TheOnion
Editorial Cartoon: 'Spreading The Good Nudes' onion.com/1qkMFLW pic.twitter.com/FD0nY7EKSW
1d               
208
188
The Onion @TheOnion
Reclusive Deity Hasn’t Written Book In Over 2,000 Years onion.com/1mn0hLy pic.twitter.com/VCsGTHjPkv
2d               
937
978
The Onion @TheOnion
Daily Spin Class Only Thing Keeping Mom From Driving Car Full Of Kids Into Ocean onion.com/1rpGMmd pic.twitter.com/ylLOGG1WUW
2d               
387
284
The Onion @TheOnion
Woman Nervous Mom Starting To Use Her As Confidant onion.com/1unFHdh pic.twitter.com/jrQjYLHEyZ
2d               
120
45
The Onion @TheOnion
Elderly Rite Aid Patron Stretching Out Conversation About Toothpaste To Prolong Human Contact onion.com/1ra2JnL pic.twitter.com/CK5D74rviv
2d               
272
224
The Onion @TheOnion
New Health Insurance Law Lets Employers Refuse To Cover Contraceptives If They’re Morally Opposed To Women onion.com/1mmZXfU
2d               
220
313
The Onion @TheOnion
This Week Last Year: Area Man’s Intelligence Probably Just Too Intimidating For Most Women onion.com/1sJHWW7
2d               
107
85
The Onion @TheOnion
Onion Sports' fantasy guru @PerryBigwell says: "Tune out the NFL’s inevitable collapse!" onion.com/1ra1bdB pic.twitter.com/9MWvGbTzqn
2d               
105
170
The Onion @TheOnion
The Week In Pictures – Week Of September 15, 2014 onion.com/1schQRc pic.twitter.com/fdgFGMiaAE
2d               
26
16
The Onion @TheOnion
"It was I who oversaw the transition to the Aloha POS system." onion.com/1v34xjd pic.twitter.com/TOvtqCyDbF
2d               
202
141
The Onion @TheOnion
Report: More Children Being Raised With Religion Of Pushier Parent onion.com/1mmZM4E
2d               
151
114
The Onion @TheOnion
iPhone 6 Plus Vs. Samsung Galaxy onion.com/1mmZnz5 pic.twitter.com/jVs0UPrnvY
2d               
823
1,197
The Onion @TheOnion
Report: Many U.S. Schools Can’t Afford Mannequins, Human Urine For Art Classes onion.com/1yjKfrc pic.twitter.com/vehVfdoDED
2d               
127
143
The Onion @TheOnion
Ugly Custody Battle Over Ian McKellen Narrowly Avoided onion.com/Zv7cbp
3d               
108
113
The Onion @TheOnion
Johnson & Johnson Hoping Brand Won’t Be Tarnished If They Dip Into Lethal Injection Game onion.com/1rmKFsj
3d               
112
101
ClickHole @ClickHole
WATCH: iPhone 6 Unboxing clickhole.com/r/1038tsd pic.twitter.com/0SQHmjbMsl
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
185
232
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Survey: 10% Of Americans Have Gone To Work High onion.com/1tzkIGq #WhatDoYouThink?
3d               
64
52
Onion Sports Network @OnionSports
Fantasy Football Week 3: Start ’Em, Sit ’Em | Expert analysis on which players to keep and which players to drop onion.com/1rmbb57
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
37
33
The Onion @TheOnion
Report: More Children Being Raised With Religion Of Pushier Parent onion.com/1sEqceT pic.twitter.com/9NyXTKaRvi
3d               
225
151
ClickHole @ClickHole
Sound like something from a horror movie? That’s what we thought too, at first clickhole.com/r/934tsd pic.twitter.com/MvnUw4xB5z
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
23
14
The Onion @TheOnion
16,000 Stained During Messiest Day In U.S. History onion.com/1o9xOVn pic.twitter.com/NvAhw9qXpV
3d               
243
156
The Onion @TheOnion
A side-by-side comparison of Apple's iPhone 6 Plus and the Samsung Galaxy S5: onion.com/1p47ig8
3d               
175
299
The Onion @TheOnion
Improve one aspect of your insignificant life by reading The Onion’s Fantasy Football coverage onion.com/1uOoXNG pic.twitter.com/eXWihddj1q
3d               
29
33
Onion Sports Network @OnionSports
Steelers To Wear Patch Honoring Victims Of Ben Roethlisberger onion.com/1wwAhhJ pic.twitter.com/VDHdXODuMd
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
808
1,321
The Onion @TheOnion
Report: Many U.S. Schools Can’t Afford Mannequins, Human Urine For Art Classes onion.com/1p408IM pic.twitter.com/LI5lA0qAp5
3d               
104
97
The AV Club @TheAVClub
What’s your personal one-hit wonder? avc.lu/1AUNNMG
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
25
8
The Onion @TheOnion
Ugly Custody Battle Over Ian McKellen Narrowly Avoided onion.com/1qRtUWS pic.twitter.com/920Mv479Q0
3d               
220
288
The Onion @TheOnion
"Honestly, name the last company that made lethal injection drugs. You can’t, right?" – Johnson & Johnson CEO onion.com/1r6mC0a
3d               
77
55
The Onion @TheOnion
Johnson & Johnson Hoping Brand Won’t Be Tarnished If They Dip Into Lethal Injection Game onion.com/1rlcPUy pic.twitter.com/GeOc7exJrx
3d               
223
169
ClickHole @ClickHole
Why Does This Kid Always Volunteer To Read In Class If He’s Not Even That Good At Reading? clickhole.com/r/926tsd pic.twitter.com/n0kfVnfEUL
3d Retweeted by TheOnion               
481
321
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: Police Slog Through 40,000 Insipid Party Pics To Find Cause Of Dorm Fire onion.com/1o947DL pic.twitter.com/WKO0xOSVBb
3d               
294
210
The Onion @TheOnion
Artifacts Discovered Buried In Washington D.C. Suggest Humans Once Passed Laws There onion.com/1o8WbSV pic.twitter.com/LUCQ5rl8li
3d               
894
1,260
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: Father Still Has Complicated Series Of File Folders With Grown Son's Name On Them onion.com/1wMQOks
3d               
77
36
The Onion @TheOnion
British Empire To Be Reduced To 8 Acres Around Buckingham Palace By 2050 onion.com/1r5a1sQ
3d               
388
525
The Onion @TheOnion
Teacher Who Learns More From Her Students Than She Teaches Them Fired onion.com/1r59KGr
3d               
275
295
The Onion @TheOnion
Man Visiting Hometown Amazed To Find All His Childhood Insecurities Still There onion.com/1uXTqrQ pic.twitter.com/vj8LH6lh8O
3d               
375
261
The Onion @TheOnion
Encouragement Of Family, Friends Motivating Man To Keep Struggling Indefinitely onion.com/1uLt8dZ pic.twitter.com/8TSK58MNyF
4d               
222
170
ClickHole @ClickHole
9 Kids In Our Homeroom Who Definitely Get High clickhole.com/r/1023tsd pic.twitter.com/AwZT9Te8eY
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
170
108
The Onion @TheOnion
From The Archives: ‘Forbes’ Names Larry Ellison 2014's Most Punchable CEO onion.com/ZsxM51 pic.twitter.com/9YdPSxpMSu
4d               
193
151
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Jack White trash-talked Foo Fighters and Rolling Stone last night, already made up with Dave Grohl avc.lu/1tqc0dq
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
70
28
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Obama Tweets To Scotland: Stay United With U.K. onion.com/1uflLsV #WhatDoYouThink?
4d               
50
52
The Onion @TheOnion
This content is brought to you by the wanton greed inherent in human nature onion.com/1yiFK0d #SPONSORED
4d               
80
68
Onion Sports Network @OnionSports
Family Members Of NFL Players Desperately Call For More Overseas Games onion.com/1pkL6O5
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
184
250
The Onion @TheOnion
STATSHOT: Why Can't We Donate Blood? bit.ly/1uLshtS pic.twitter.com/L8HCoW6Is8
4d               
41
52
The Onion @TheOnion
Archaeologists say the civilization thrived for generations before dying off suddenly onion.com/YVNcPs pic.twitter.com/nRPKl0K2Fs
4d               
604
745
ClickHole @ClickHole
If You Don’t Think You Have Any Racial Prejudices, You Better Watch This Video #BringHimBack clickhole.com/r/1026tsd pic.twitter.com/c1YoVIfIxM
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
129
123
The Onion @TheOnion
British Empire To Be Reduced To 8 Acres Around Buckingham Palace By 2050 onion.com/1swdcYp pic.twitter.com/0WwTjhao8u
4d               
795
1,290
The Onion @TheOnion
#Sponsored: Read The Onion's special coverage on "House & Home," brought to you by Febreze: onion.com/1qOyh4T
4d               
10
7
The Onion @TheOnion
F. Scott Fitzgerald Estate Wondering Why The Hell @KenBurns Hasn’t Come Knocking Yet onion.com/XplwAO pic.twitter.com/lhm05ZAbyh
4d               
273
221
The Onion @TheOnion
Teacher Who Learns More From Her Students Than She Teaches Them Fired onion.com/1pkEAqv pic.twitter.com/LhjhBQL5cK
4d               
513
523
The Onion @TheOnion
"Scotland, if you vote yes to independence, that’s it." – David Cameron onion.com/1wsZnOu pic.twitter.com/pYdsRClN7F
4d               
744
1,050
The Onion @TheOnion
Onion Sports' fantasy guru @PerryBigwell says: "Tune out the NFL’s inevitable collapse!" onion.com/1p2v1gQ pic.twitter.com/ZPTnLIZcj3
4d               
132
187
ClickHole @ClickHole
'Seinfeld’ Reunion For Real This Time? Cast All Spotted In Same Southern California City clickhole.com/r/1013tsd pic.twitter.com/N7EZEz54NJ
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
278
197
The Onion @TheOnion
"It’s all exactly the same as it was almost 20 years ago." onion.com/1wImTtO pic.twitter.com/3w4C1ROCgo
4d               
299
220
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Kevin Smith’s Tusk is little more than the cinematic equivalent of a dare avc.lu/1tnzyzz
4d Retweeted by TheOnion               
43
15
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Many Pediatricians Avoiding Talking To Teens About Sex onion.com/ZrDHrd #WhatDoYouThink?
4d               
33
22
The Onion @TheOnion
Encouragement Of Family, Friends Motivating Man To Keep Struggling Indefinitely onion.com/1tnPYYJ pic.twitter.com/76oZKWvdkM
4d               
235
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The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: News Of Uncle's Death Deleted By Spam Filter onion.com/1DlD41P
4d               
101
58
The Onion @TheOnion
Did you know the average school spends $800 a year on pink slips? onion.com/1ASAHiS pic.twitter.com/0G1LtNAPF4
4d               
95
63
The Onion @TheOnion
Highly Touted Terrorist Prospect Weighing Multiple Recruitment Offers onion.com/1qZWrs4 pic.twitter.com/OMBImcWqrK
4d               
364
320
The Onion @TheOnion
History Will Be The True Judge Of My Tenure As Outback Steakhouse Shift Manager onion.com/1ua9YMh
4d               
158
93
The Onion @TheOnion
"Even my harshest critics would have to admit that I inherited a bad situation." onion.com/1mctMju pic.twitter.com/gJtdIgExtx
4d               
288
223
The Onion @TheOnion
Fantasy Team’s Performance Only Thing Man Holding Himself Accountable For onion.com/1s7k9oD pic.twitter.com/8xsSgJ6G5O
4d               
196
218
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Univision finished its version of #BreakingBad in less than four months avc.lu/1r1P7Lf pic.twitter.com/H7olmKE7DA
5d Retweeted by TheOnion               
247
200
ClickHole @ClickHole
Can You Match These Famous Comedy Quotes To The Coworkers Quoting Them? clickhole.com/r/867tsd pic.twitter.com/Xn3Sip9LPO
5d Retweeted by TheOnion               
189
123
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] Study: Liberals, Conservatives Smell Different onion.com/Xk40hf #WhatDoYouThink?
5d               
66
60
The Onion @TheOnion
New text-based alert system to warn Americans who are in 10-mile radius of an NFL player onion.com/YTvNqA pic.twitter.com/PPpbwH7EOg
5d               
3,109
5,381
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