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| Image | Name | Location | Twitter since | Links |
|---|---|---|---|---|
![]() | E=mc² | 2011-08-04 | ![]() | |
| @samalmightysam | 686 days | |||
| Comedian, Writer, Rocket Scientist. | ||||
| Followers | Following | Tweets | Lists | Favorites |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 108,496 | 36,084 | 1,577 | 1,801 | 268,134 |
![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Don't try to explain yourself to stupid people. You're not stupid, remember? Or are you? | |||
13h
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| I hate having a lot of imaginary friends because I always have to pay for the beers. | |||
14h
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| In hell, for your birthday, they give you socks in an iPhone 5 box. | |||
1d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you were born because your parents had sex | |||
2d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you're a dinasaur | |||
2d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you weren't invited to your parents wedding. | |||
2d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you like big butts and you can not lie. | |||
2d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you're mermaid | |||
2d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| I'm responsible for what I do, not for what people say I do. | |||
5d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| It doesn't matter how ugly, weird, big nose, short or stupid you are, if you can make a woman laugh, she's yours forever. | |||
5d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Twitter is my serious account, the funny one is my bank account. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| RT if you're Chewbacca | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| — Could you close the window please, it's cold. — Sure, *Alt + F4*. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Behind silence, there is a hidden love. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Don't tell me you miss me, tell me at what time you're coming over. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| For a person you love to appreciate you, you have to prove to them you're also able of stop loving them and of moving on. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| If you're not in my future I'm coming back. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Only love can make us do stupid shit like waiting for someone to change like if we're gonna live forever. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| This having to wake up every morning and doing real life grown up shit is some bullshit. | |||
6d
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![]() | E=mc² @samalmightysam | ||
| Don't attack others when the war is against yourself. | |||
7d
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