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| Oh you're sick of hearing about everyone's drama on Facebook? PIease post another status complaining about everyone complaining. |
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| Oh so she told you you could still be friends? Let me know how that works out. |
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| I see you took a screenshot of a conversation on your iPhone. You must think it's so important everyone has to see it. |
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| Oh you had to wake up before 9? Please tell me how hard your life is. |
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| You liked a picture of a skinny African boy on Facebook because "you would help him." You must be a humanitarian. |
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| Oh you use Instragram? Please tell me how much of a profesional photographer you are |
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| Oh you cyber bully kids on Facebook and Twitter? You must be so tough behind that computer screen of yours. |
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| Oh you have a stutter? This whole time I thought you were remixing your conversation. |
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| Oh you drink and drive? You should get a business card that says "future murderer." |
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| Oh yes your insomnia is so horrific. Please tell me more about how you can't sleep till 1am. |
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| Your car has a body kit? It must go extremely fast. |
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| Oh you're dating my ex already? I thought the 5 second rule only applied for food. |
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| Oh you're getting back together with your ex? I bet that will work out great this time |
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| You're dropping out of college because "Bill Gates did it"? I'm sure you'll be just as successful. |
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| Oh you're 15 and "get money"? Tell me about your brilliant business ideas. |
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| Oh you got super busy and couldn't return my phone call? I understand being unemployed really catches up to you some days. |
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| Oh you just graduated? That's nice. I will have the Mocha Frappuccino. |
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| Oh you post photos of yourself in the mirror? Please do post more you have a very nice bathroom. |
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| Oh you're over him? I can tell by all of those Adele lyrics you post. |
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| Oh you hate corporate America? You should tweet about it from your iPhone. |
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