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| Anyone want to take me to the Strip Bar for free Burgers? I put out & there's free Burgers. |
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For those of you who think flash mobs are stupid.
You obviously have no soul.
They are magical and life changing.
I have a life, I swear |
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Oh yeah baby RT me like that ... Mmmm star me there oh don't stop, I am so close to a FF...
Twitter porn |
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Who would say no to a massage?
Touching leads to kissing, kissing leads to more touching which in turn leads to fucking. |
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| Seriously peeps headed to I hope you prepared your liver, us hosers are about to melt the rink. |
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| Your "Wedding Ideas" board on Pinterest provides me hours of entertainment. Those Electric Blue Cowboy Boots will really cover your cankeles |
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1. Find a dimly lit gas station bathroom.
2. Replace the can of air freshener by the sink with a canister of bear mace.
3. Run like hell. |
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| As Wichita OKd any size of blade to be carried, this totally requires me getting a sword & screaming THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE in a crowd. Duh. |
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| He's got a Chin Strap & a Faux Hawk!!! See last Tweet |
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| I think this guy in the Ed Hardy shirt asked for every douche tattoo ever. |
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| My mother told me to never talk politics, religion, or to open links in DMs. |
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| I stopped following politics because they call it a game - but there's blood in the game & I prefer to call that a Sport |
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| what about Recovered Juggalos? |
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| Can't sleep, sanity will eat me |
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| Twitter is a giant chat room for people who are antisocial, too lazy to respond, and/or narcissistic |
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| I would eat pudding out of Joss Stones butthole. |
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| From here on in, all family gifts will comprise of loosely wrapped live spiders |
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I like how you taste when I lick you.
--me to my nacho cheese Doritos |
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| Your Polo shirt matches your shorts & you have a Coke nose.... Hey my names Gonzo hook a brother up? |
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