User profile by Twopcharts

Image	Name	Location	Twitter since
	Simon Renwick	München, Deutschland	2010-06-24
@SimonRenwick82	1,091 days
One time student and gentleman's fancy, current international playboy.

Followers	Following	Tweets	Lists	Favorites
26	136	187	0	89

What do you mean heat induced lethargy isn't a recognised dosabiltyhnmcxxfjm....

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	I don't have an exit strategy incase I see a colleague on the ubahn on the way to work.
8d

If you're handsome I'm going to caress your cheek and whisper "butterskin" in your ear. Shh. Shush. You cant stop this.

"Let me just gently press my groin into your shoulder" #thingsotherpassengersarethinking

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	This job seems more suited to a monkey, or a common nurse in a zoo.
12d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	There aren't enough iced beverages nowadays. Please invent 3
13d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	A little off the top and sides. A lot off the haunches, please.
14d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	Hi girl at the gym with black stockings on. What's going on? What are you trying to tell us?
15d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	@NickSugarbaker ich gebe dir einen auf den deckel
18d in reply to NickSugarbaker

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	@NickSugarbaker a hellish German bureaucracy of which Australia has no equivalent. I think they're punishing themselves for the holocaust.
18d in reply to NickSugarbaker

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	Nothing like an enraging trip to the KVR to start the day. Why, Germany, why?
19d

For a few coins the machines at the laundrette let you dump your dirty load right inside them.

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	16 minutes till the next tram?! MVG you're a dirty time-rapist.
21d

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Keep your Pringles closest.

I'm so tired i could eat a baby!

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	Watch out! Sexy grandmas want your babies!
37d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	What is this, Winter 2: The wintering?
37d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	There are too many people in this carriage. Everyone born in an even month please begin cannibalising the passenger to your left.
39d

	Simon Renwick @SimonRenwick82
	My Y2K bug preparations are terribly behind schedule :(
41d

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